


I Know What You Did Last Summer

by LadyLibby



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: (not by Kylo dw), Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attempted Sexual Assault, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Ex-Marine!Kylo Ren, F/M, FinnPoe is alive and well, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Kylo is misunderstood, Love, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Romance, Romantic Tension, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, and brooding, just the way we like him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-02-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:33:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 24,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22153324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyLibby/pseuds/LadyLibby
Summary: “Come home with me.” Rey said.“What?”“Come live with me for the summer.” Rey repeated, liking the idea more and more by the second. “Our house is huge, so you could have your own room. You can get a job with me, or somewhere else, or not at all, whatever. And we can still hang out all the time!”“Rey, what about your family? I can’t just barge in for three months. It’s too much of an imposition.”“Don’t worry about that. They’ll love you.” Rey insisted.Y/N bit her lip, trying to keep herself from smiling. “Yes. Yeah, okay.”Rey pulled her into a bone-crushing hug. “This is going to be the best summer ever.”She didn’t know the half of it.
Relationships: Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Reader, Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/You, Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/You, Leia Organa/Han Solo, Poe Dameron/Finn
Comments: 156
Kudos: 550





	1. Welcome to Skywalker Ranch

**Author's Note:**

> An enemies to lovers modern au that no one except for me asked for :D

Early afternoon sunlight shone through the trees, revealing the intricate patterns of veins on each leaf. A gentle breeze blew past, shaking the branches and making the leaves whisper and dance. Y/N closed her eyes, letting the dappled sunlight kiss her cheeks. She stayed there, on the edge of sleep, just breathing. She felt the ground beneath her, the tree trunk at her back, and the sky above. Her eyes remained closed even as she heard footsteps approaching. Y/N knew who it was. They settled beside her and the two sat in silence a while longer, enjoying the afternoon. 

Y/N let awareness come back into her limbs, untucking her legs and wiggling her feet. She stretched long, up towards the branches overhead as her eyes opened. 

“Finished studying?” Rey asked, tipping her head back to watch the leaves. 

“Yup.” Y/N said. “Wanted to enjoy the day before the exam.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me.” Rey shuddered. 

Y/N laughed. “Think of it this way: one more week, and then we get to go home. No more exams for three months.” 

“Yeah, but we won’t see each other every day anymore.” 

“Don’t remind _me_!” Y/N said, throwing a twig at her best friend. 

“Are you leaving right after exams?” Rey asked. “I’m here until Saturday. We could make it a big ‘Goodbye for the Summer Bash’.”

“That sounds amazing!” Y/N smiled. “Actually, I need to check with Mom about when she’s coming to pick me up…excuse me for a moment, darling.” 

Y/N grabbed her phone from her bag, dialing her mom. She rolled her eyes at the voicemail recording of herself at six, saying to call back later. Y/N flopped back down, putting her head on Rey’s lap. 

“So what fancy vacation are you going on this summer?” 

“The grand Stay At Home Adventure.” Rey said. “Mom and Dad said I need to get a job this year. Besides, Mom is in D.C. for most of the summer anyway and Dad isn’t totally recovered from his heart attack last fall.” 

“Hey,” Y/N poked Rey in the stomach. “Summer jobs are a good way to keep busy and make money. Plus, if you’re looking for adventure, you could always come visit me.” 

Rey swatted her hand away playfully. “Nah.” 

Y/N sat up, gasping in mock offense. “Well, I _was_ going to bake some pre-exam lemon squares for our suite today, but now you can kiss that goodbye–” 

“Kidding! I was kidding!” Rey exclaimed. “Please, don’t deprive me of brain food. _Please._ ” 

“That’s right. Grovel.” Y/N crossed her arms, nodding imperiously. 

Rey bowed down like a proper subject, and Y/N couldn’t help but burst out laughing. They fell on the ground in a messy pile of giggles. 

Rey was bent over her engineering notes a few hours later when Y/N burst in. 

“Jesus!” Rey yelped, pressing her hand to her chest. 

Y/N began to pace, her eyes wild and talking at a mile a minute. Recovering from her shock, Rey stood. She took Y/N by the arm and made her sit down on the bed. 

“Hey, hey.” Rey said calmly. “Slow down. Breathe.” 

Y/N stopped, inhaling deeply before letting out a slow exhale. 

“What happened?” Rey asked. 

“Mom called back about picking me up.” Y/N swallowed thickly, “She’s been planning to renovate the house and a contractor just came through, but work has to start immediately.” 

“Okay…” 

“I can’t go home.” Y/N said. “She’s decided to take a trip with her college friends while the house is being worked on.” 

“Can you stay here? You could extend your job at the cafe for the summer–” 

“I already looked into that. My financial aid doesn’t cover the summer if I’m not taking classes and I won’t make nearly enough money even if I take another job. I don’t know what to do.” Y/N said, her eyes shining with unshed tears. 

“Come home with me.” Rey said. 

“What?” 

“Come live with me for the summer.” Rey repeated, liking the idea more and more by the second. “Our house is huge, so you could have your own room. You can get a job with me, or somewhere else, or not at all, whatever. And we can still hang out all the time!” 

“Rey, what about your family? I can’t just barge in for three months. It’s too much of an imposition.” 

“Don’t worry about that. They’ll love you.” Rey insisted. 

“It’s too much. I could never repay you.” Y/N argued. 

“You can pay rent in cookies.” 

“That’s ridiculous.” 

“Seriously! I brought that batch you made home for Christmas and everyone said they were the best cookies they’d ever had. If you bake every so often, Dad will want you to stay forever.” 

“You’re really sure about this?” Y/N asked, letting the idea of a summer with her best friend in a mansion settle. 

“Completely.” Rey said. “What do you say?” 

Y/N bit her lip, trying to keep herself from smiling. “Yes. Yeah, okay.” 

Rey pulled her into a bone-crushing hug. “This is going to be the best summer ever.” 

She didn’t know the half of it. 

~

“Is everything else packed?” Y/N asked, packing a freshly baked batch of cookies into tins. 

“Yes.” Rey grabbed one of the treats. 

“Hey!” Y/N protested, but Rey popped the cookie in her mouth and started chewing. 

“I just carried all the bags to the door. I deserve some compensation for the use of my muscles.” She said around the cookie. 

“Fine. But just the one.” Y/N said, covering the tins quickly. “I mean it.”

Someone knocked on the open door. “Anybody home?” 

“Poe!” Rey exclaimed.

Y/N turned around in time to see the blur she used to know as Rey, running at the newcomer. They embraced, her momentum knocking him backwards a little. 

“Hey there, grizzly bear.” Poe greeted. 

Rey pulled back, punching him in the arm. “Shut up, buttercup.” 

He laughed, rubbing his arm. Y/N liked him instantly. He glowed with a certain self-assurance Y/N wished she had. Poe fixed his smile on Y/N as he approached. It was wide and bright, the kind of smile that makes friends and influences people. 

“This is Poe. My oldest brother.” Rey said. 

“Hi, I’m Y/N.” She introduced, holding out her hand. 

Poe took her hand in both of his, his grip was warm and firm. Steady, she decided, he was reliable, consistent, a golden boy. Definitely the oldest child. 

“It’s very nice to meet you, Y/N,” Poe said, “Rey has told us all about you.” 

“Uh oh.” Y/N raised an eyebrow at Rey. 

“Only the good bits.” Rey promised. 

“Don’t worry,” Poe smiled, “We have a nice long car ride for me to form my own opinion.” 

“How do you feel about bribery?” Y/N asked. 

“Love it.” 

“Cookie?” Y/N held out one of the tins. 

Poe accepted, taking a bite. He closed his eyes, savoring the chocolate, buttery goodness. 

“You are sitting up front with me.” Poe declared, nodding at Y/N. 

He took another cookie, holding it between his teeth while he picked up one of Rey’s boxes. Rey and Y/N joined him, gathering their things and heading out of the now empty suite. 

“What about Ben?” Rey asked in the elevator. 

“He’s driving himself home. If he ever comes home.” Poe said, his tone flat and disapproving. 

“Give him a break.” Rey argued. 

“He gets enough breaks, bear. He needs to grow up and get over it.” Poe said. 

“Sorry, um, who’s Ben?” Y/N asked. 

“Our brother.” Rey explained. 

“I didn’t know you had a brother here.” 

“Yeah, well, he doesn’t like to _associate_ with us.” Poe said. 

“He’ll be a senior next year.” Rey said. 

Y/N could tell Ben was a sore subject, so she didn’t press any further. 

“Are you in school, Poe?” She asked. 

“I’m flattered you’d think so, but no. I graduated from the University of D’Qar a few years ago.” Poe said. “Now I work at a tech start-up.” 

“He _runs_ a tech start-up.” Rey corrected. “Commander Poe Dameron Solo of Resistance Technologies.” 

“Not the most accurate title, but hey, I’ll take it.” He smiled. 

They arrived at the car. Y/N was almost surprised to find it was a nice, practical Subaru. Poe seemed like a Tesla kind of guy. She and Rey helped him hoist everything into the trunk, playing an elaborate game of trunk tetris to get everything in and miraculously close the trunk. With another cookie each and the radio blasting, they were off.

~

A wide expanse of green lawn sprawled from the front of the house to a line of trees by the road, obscuring the house from any passing traffic. As the car made its way up the driveway, Y/N forgot how to breath. Whatever she had imagined when Rey talked about her home, this was not it. Skywalker Ranch was certainly large, three full stories (and a turret) tall, and about fifty feet wide. Y/N immediately fell in love with the Victorian style, pale blue paint, and wrap-around porch. 

“It’s beautiful.” She said, resisting the urge to press her nose against the window like a small child in an aquarium. 

Thunder rumbled in the distance as she got out of the car, not taking her eyes off the house. Y/N shouldered her backpack and rolled her suitcase behind her as she took deliberate steps up the ornate front door. Poe held it open, gesturing for her to enter first. 

If she thought the outside was grand, the inside stole her heart. The foyer was beautiful, but not lavish. The walls were painted in warm, comforting tones that made the house seem like a home, rather than a museum of antiques. Y/N moved toward the grand staircase, admiring the chandelier hanging from the top floor. She backed up suddenly as two dogs came bounding down the stairs. They circled her legs, barking to say hello before dashing off again to jump on Rey. 

“Hey boys, hi, hey, yes I missed you too!” 

The larger dog, who appeared to be a mixed breed with beautiful grey and white fur came back over to Y/N, nudging her hand with his nose. She happily obliged, crouching down to scratch behind his ears. 

“That’s Artoo.” Poe said. “And that–” 

“Oh!” A flash of yellow knocked into her chest as the smaller dog, a golden retriever puppy, began licking her cheek. 

“That is Beebee.” Poe chuckled. 

Y/N laughed, petting both dogs. “I love them!” 

“Oh thank goodness you’re back. I could barely handle both of them on my own.” 

Y/N looked up at the posh accent to find a bald man in a suit. He bent down to help her up, somehow managing to keep his posture impeccable. 

“Pleasure to meet you, Miss Y/N. I am C-3, the housekeeper.” The man said. 

“C-3? That’s an interesting name.” She said, shaking his hand. 

“My full name is Charles Constantine Cooper, but upon hiring me twenty-four years ago, Mr. Solo gave me the nickname C-3, and it’s rather stuck, you see.” 

“Would you rather I call you Charles?” Y/N asked. 

He faltered, looking at her with a peculiar expression of vulnerability and surprise. Had no one ever asked what name _he_ wanted to be called?

“If you like, Miss.” He said softly. 

“It’s lovely to meet you too, Charles.” She smiled. 

He smiled back for a moment, before blinking rapidly as he remembered himself. “Your room is ready for you, Miss Y/N, if you’d like your things brought up.”

Y/N looked to Rey and Poe. 

“Go make yourself at home and get the tour I know C-3 is dying to give.” She winked at Y/N, “I know you’re dying to snoop around.”

“If you insist.” Y/N said, picking up her suitcase again. 

“No, no,” C-3 tittered, taking the handle from her. “Allow me.” 

Y/N followed C-3’s measured gait to the stairs, all the way up to the third floor. She followed him down a long corridor, but stopped short when he opened an old wooden door, revealing a narrower spiral staircase. 

“Come, come, Miss Y/N.” He said, continuing to climb. 

The top of the staircase opened into a circular room. Bookshelves covered every inch of wall space with the exception of a window seat and a queen bed on the opposite side of the room. 

“Is this...am I staying in the…” 

“The Tower Room, yes. Miss Rey thought you would like it.” He said. “I can find you another guest room if this does not suit you–” 

“No!” Y/N exclaimed. “No, it’s wonderful, thank you.” 

Y/N watched in silent awe as C-3 demonstrated how to open the two false bookcases that led to the closet and bathroom respectively. She set her bags down on the bed, walking the full circumference once, trying (and failing) to take everything in. 

“Charles?” 

“Yes, Miss Y/N?” 

“Would you mind showing me the rest of the house? I think if I stay here any longer right now, I might not leave.” She said. 

C-3 chuckled, leading her back down the spiral staircase to the third floor. The rest of the house was just as beautiful as her room, a delightful mix of classical style and modern flair. Her favorites were the front parlor and her library bedroom, and not just because they were the only ones she knew she’d be able to find on her own. 

Y/N returned to her room as rain began to fall. The drops hammered down onto the roof, tapping against her tower refuge. She decided to unpack before meeting the rest of the family at dinner. She knew a bit from Rey, but after the surprise of learning about a second brother, Y/N didn’t know what to expect. Would Ben be at dinner? What happened that made Poe, the charismatic, smiling man that he was, dislike Ben so much? What about the rest of them? Would Rey’s parents like her? They were a pretty formidable couple, the businessman who made so much money he retired to run a bar at forty-five years old and the pioneering, beloved state Senator. 

Y/N tucked her favorite sundress away into the closet as a knock sounded on the door. 

“Come in,” She called, shutting the closet. 

Rey entered, immediately flopping down on the bed. “So? What do you think of your room?” 

“It’s amazing. I don’t think I’ll be leaving it. Sorry if everyone was expecting me at dinner…” 

Rey laughed. “I knew you’d love it. It’s got that whole...gothic literature romance vibe you love so much. All you’re missing is a Heathcliff.” 

“Ugh, no thank you. I prefer Darcy. I’ll take repressed and misunderstood over toxic and problematic any day.” 

“Fair enough.” Rey replied. 

Y/N looked down at her clothes. She picked at the hem of her cardigan, wondering if she should change out of the jeans. 

“Is this okay for dinner? Should I be more dressy?” She asked. 

“You look like you. It’s perfect.” Rey assured her. “Besides, I’ll be shocked if Uncle Luke changes out of his bathrobe.” 

Y/N wrinkled her nose. 

“Oh! Speaking of which,” Rey said, standing up in excitement. “Poe and I would be forever grateful if you asked Uncle Luke what he does for a living.” 

“Is it like a family joke or something?”

“No, that’s the thing! He leaves for the day every couple of days, but we have no idea what he does, and it’s _way_ too late for any of us to ask now. You’re the perfect excuse.” 

“Okay…” Y/N agreed, intrigued and scared in equal measure. 

“Okay.” Rey smiled, looping her arm through Y/N’s elbow. “Shall we?” 

Y/N nodded. “We shall.” 

The chandelier in the dining room cast a warm glow over the party, making the room feel cozy despite the downpour outside. Rey presented Y/N to Senator Organa first, who pulled her into one of the best hugs Y/N had ever experienced. 

“Call me Leia.” She said with a smile. 

“You’re the baker?” Han asked, shaking her hand. 

“Yes, I actually brought you some cookies. Rey mentioned that you liked them.” Y/N said, handing him the other tin. 

Han eyed her for a moment before smiling at her, a humorous twinkle in his eyes. “Alright, I guess you can stay.” 

Y/N smiled back. 

Luke had, in fact, changed out of his bathrobe into an old grey sweater with plenty of holes and loose pieces of yarn. He didn’t hug her or shake her hand, opting to nod noncommittally while he poured himself a glass of whiskey. 

“He likes you.” Rey whispered. 

“He does?” 

“Trust me.” 

She met Finn next, after he was done giving Rey a noogie. 

“This is the idiot from next door whose dating my brother.” Rey introduced. 

Y/N smiled at the sight of his fingers intertwined with Poe’s. 

“Um, try childhood best friend and generally amazing human being.” Finn corrected, smiling at Y/N. 

“Oh! You’re the one who ran away from home!” Y/N said. “Rey’s told me about you, it’s nice to finally put a face to the stories.” 

Finn elbowed Rey in the ribs. “You told her _that_ one?” 

“And many others, don’t worry.” Rey said. 

C-3 appeared in the doorway to the kitchen. “Dinner is served.”

The summer inhabitants of Skywalker Ranch took their seats around the table, with Leia and Han at either end. Y/N sat next to Rey, across from Finn, Poe, and Luke. She noted that the chair on her other side remained empty despite the place being set. The food looked as delicious as it smelled, and Y/N couldn’t wait to dig in. 

Before they began, however, Leia raised her glass for a toast. “To old faces, new faces, and an exciting summer ahead.” 

“To summer!” They echoed, clinking glasses. 

“May it be full of surprises.” Luke added. 

He looked at Y/N with an expression that could only be described as _I know something you don’t know._

Before Y/N could process the moment entirely, the double doors to the dining room burst open. They swung violently inward, hitting the walls with a crack. A man stood in the doorway. 

He looked like thunder. He was tall, with lengthy black hair to match his clothing. Rainwater fell off him, tapping the wood floor with every drop. His broad shoulders tensed as his hands curled into fists, his jaw set in determined anger. 

Y/N’s eyes widened. 

She knew him. Kylo Ren. 

“Ben–” His mother finally broke the stunned silence. 

Her voice, however, seemed to break him as well. He surged forward, making a beeline for Poe. 

“You.” He growled. 

Y/N felt a shiver run down her spine at the sound of his voice. Lightning flashed outside as Poe stood to face the taller man. 

“Hiya, Ben.” Poe flashed a fake smile. 

“You bastard.” Kylo growled. “You–”

“Language!” Leia interjected, moving towards her sons. “Ben, what are you–” 

“Don’t, Mother.” He snapped. 

“Do not take that tone with your mother.” Han warned, getting up from his seat as well. 

Y/N and Rey stood as well, edging around the table, unsure of what to do. 

“He left me. They–” Kylo pointed a finger at Poe and Rey. “They left me. I had to take a bus to the nearest town and _walk_ here.” 

Y/N’s chest tightened. He’d _walked_ here?

“You drove yourself last time.” Poe challenged. “You didn’t call to ask me for a ride, so how was I supposed to know–”

Kylo stepped closer, towering over his brother. “You’re such a dipshit. You could have asked–” 

“You made it here in one piece, didn’t you? Stop it with your little tantrum. Nobody likes a baby. Baby Ben–” 

He raised his arm, but Rey leapt into the middle, pushing her brothers apart. Kylo backed into Y/N. She stumbled backwards, scared. Surprised, he spun around to see who it was and noticed her for the first time. He fixed his intense gaze on her, a frown quickly overcoming the look of surprise on his face. 

“You.”


	2. Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y/N's history with Kylo is revealed...among other things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just couldn't wait any longer. I hope you enjoy!

“What are  _ you _ doing here?” Kylo asked, his tone dripping with venom. 

Rey stood up, hooking her arm through Y/N’s. “ _ I  _ invited her.” 

“Why?” 

“I happen to be her suitemate and best friend.” Y/N said, holding her chin high. “I’m staying for the summer.” 

“How do you two know each other?” Leia asked, looking between Y/N and her younger son. 

He stared at Y/N, as if daring her to tell them. She stared right back, before answering calmly. 

“We had a class together in the fall.” 

“Oh? Which one?” Leia asked, sitting back down. 

“Economic Theory.” Kylo ground out. “Advanced lecture.” 

“You must be terribly smart to get into such a high level course your sophomore year.” Leia said. 

“She is.” Rey said proudly. 

“Your son sat a few seats away from me, I believe.” Y/N said. “I knew him by a different name, though, that’s why I never realized he was related to Rey.” 

Han raised an eyebrow. Y/N turned to Ben, her eyes flashing in challenge. 

“Kylo Ren.” 

He held her gaze, his face a mask of unreadable expressions. She refused to break eye contact first, knowing he’d take it as some sort of victory. God, he was the  _ worst. _

“Ugh, what stupid name.” Poe muttered under his breath. 

Kylo cut his eyes over to Poe, looking as if he wished he could grab the steak knife from the table and run his brother through with it. C-3 wobbled closer, afraid to intrude. 

“Mr. Benjamin, why don’t you find some dry clothes and have dinner. It was about to be served.” He suggested tentatively. 

Kylo’s eyes swept the room again, regarding each of the dinner party with contempt. He turned on his heel without a word, slamming the doors again behind him. 

“So, is he coming back, or…?” Finn wondered. 

“Don’t know. May as well start.” Han said, gesturing for C-3 to get on with it. 

“I’m sorry about Ben,” Leia said to Y/N with a tight smile, “He’s had...a rough go of things lately.” 

“It’s always been ‘difficult’ for him being the same age as Poe. He’s technically the middle child though, since he’s six months younger.” Rey said sarcastically. “And he uses it as an excuse to be an asshole most of the time.” 

“Not to mention being the odd one out.” Han added, taking a big swig from drink. 

“Odd one out?” Y/N asked. 

“He’s the only biological kid.” Luke said. “Other two are adopted.” 

“Oh.” 

C-3 finished ladelling out the soup, and the party ate in mildly uncomfortable silence. Y/N almost sighed in relief when she heard footsteps in the corridor. 

Almost. 

It seemed like Kylo was incapable of opening doors unless he opened them with force. They didn’t swing back to hit the walls this time, but his entrance was known. She laughed to herself,  _ middle child. _

Her mood soured immediately, however, when she remembered the only open seat was directly next to her. Kylo faltered as well,  _ in disgust, _ she assumed before deigning to sit beside her. His knee bumped hers under the table. They locked eyes for a moment. Kylo moved his leg, his frown returning. He stared angrily into his soup. 

Rey cleared her throat. “You never told me Y/N, what was Ben like in class?” 

Kylo’s head shot up, and Y/N could feel the daggers in his stare whoosh past her nose at Rey. In her periphery, she saw his fist clench. 

_ November  _

_ Professor Calrissian turned away from the board and instructed the class to pair up for discussion. Y/N turned to Alex who always sat next to her and always agreed to be her partner. To her dismay, he was nodding meaningfully at the girl sitting in front of them. Something...Connix? Y/N couldn’t remember her name.  _

_ “Alex, who am I going to work with?”  _

_ He nodded to the left. Y/N followed with her eyes, landing on the familiar sight of Kylo Ren. She let her eyes travel their usual path, over his feathery hair, nose and strong chin. He was wearing a turtleneck and leather jacket that day. He was so handsome. She wanted to hear his voice, hear his thoughts on the lecture. He spoke so rarely in class, but she loved it when he did. Kylo had insights she could listen to instead of the lecture. What stories must he carry with him? Kylo was older, around twenty-six. She knew he’d been a Marine before college, but he’d never shared anything more.  _

_ He must have felt her gaze, because he turned to look at her. She immediately averted her eyes, sinking down in her chair.  _

_ “You’ve been staring at him all semester. Shoot your shot, queen.” Alex said.  _

_ Y/N bumped him with her shoulder. “Shhh. He might hear you.”  _

_ “It’s not like you’re not asking him out. You’re just asking to be partners for like, a minute. He won’t say no. He’s not an asshole.”  _

_ “You’re right.” Y/N took a deep breath. “Okay.”  _

_ She stood up, holding her notebook to her chest, and approached him. He was drawing something in the margins of his notebook. It looked like a gear inside a circle. There were three of them above it.  _

_ “Um, Kylo?”  _

_ He shut the notebook.  _

_ “Would you,” Y/N swallowed, “Would you like to be my discussion partner?”  _

_ He looked up at her and she caught a whiff of his cologne, or his shampoo, or a mix of both. Kylo smelled like pine and leather and something she couldn’t quite place. It made her head feel light. His gaze tracked from her head to her toes and back up. Then he looked straight ahead, at the board like she was a particle of dust that had just floated past.  _

_ “No.” He said.  _

_ She wasn’t sure if she was more upset at his answer or at the surge of emotion it caused in her chest. Y/N felt her throat tightening as tears welled up in her eyes.  _

_ “Oh…” She said, betrayed by the wobbliness of her own voice. “Okay, then. Um, have a good day.”  _

_ Y/N walked numbly back to her seat. She just stared at her notebook for the rest of the class, hoping he didn’t notice when three tears dropped onto the paper.  _

Y/N exhaled. “Well, he was…”  _ An asshole.  _ “Very intelligent.”

She felt him staring at her. Y/N refused to acknowledge him. 

Poe coughed. “Really?” 

“Yes.” She said, containing the memory. “He didn’t speak much, but when he did, he was very insightful.” 

“Oh,” Leia said, a tiny smile of pride blooming on her face. 

Y/N saw Ben’s hand relax out of the corner of her eye. She took a sip of her drink, looking across the table. 

“Luke, what do you do for a living?” She asked casually. 

Rey and Poe sat a little straighter in their chairs. 

“Oh, a little of this, a little of that.” Luke replied. 

He said nothing more, making the two siblings deflate a little in their chairs. Y/N heard Kylo emit a little huff of laughter. The tension seemed to break after that, and while Kylo said nothing else for the rest of the evening, the conversation flowed nicely. Around eight, Rey and Y/N began swapping yawns. 

“I think it’s time for bed.” Han remarked. 

“Yeah, long day.” Y/N said. 

“She’s faking.” Rey said in a stage whisper. “She just wants to retreat to the tower.” 

“I can understand that.” Luke said. 

“Get some rest.” Leia said. 

Y/N pushed back her chair and left with a gentle good night. 

“Well, I like her.” Han said. 

“She seems cool.” Finn agreed. 

“Dad, did you leave any cookies for the rest of us?” Poe asked. “Those things are like crack.” 

While the family chattered, Kylo sat in silence, watching the doorway Y/N left through. 

~

Y/N woke early the next morning, her school year routine not yet gone from her body. She stretched, enjoying the large, soft bed. The soft blue light of morning caressed the old leather-bound book spines circling the room. Y/N inhaled, enjoying the smell of paper, ink, and stories that surrounded her. She could get used to this. 

Y/N slipped out of the covers before she got too comfortable, pulling on a light robe. She shivered a little when her bare feet touched the stone of the spiral staircase. Big houses were cold. The kitchen on the first floor was much more inviting. Morning light shone through large windows, complementing the yellow walls. Y/N felt like she was standing inside a sunflower. 

“Good morning, Miss Y/N.” C-3 greeted from the stove. 

“Good morning, Charles.” She smiled, perching on a stool by the kitchen island. 

“Was the room to your liking?” He asked. 

“Very much, thank you.” Y/N said. “What are you making?” 

“The rest of the household isn’t usually awake for another half an hour or so, so if I make muffins now, they’ll be fresh out of the oven in time to go with the eggs and bacon. Shall I brew you some coffee?” 

“Tea, please.” Y/N said. 

C-3 brought over a little box boasting a wide selection of teas to choose from. Y/N picked a simple irish breakfast, the same brand her mom kept at home. C-3 made himself a mug as well, pulling out measuring cups and a shiny mixer while the tea steeped. 

“Can I help?” Y/N asked, getting up from her seat. 

“Oh no, no thank you.” He said, flustered. “It is my job and you are a guest.” 

“I love to bake.” Y/N protested. “Please? I promise I’ll let you do most of the work.” 

He considered the offer for a moment, trying to remember his last morning off. Looking only mildly terrified, he nodded. 

“Yes, alright. Here’s the recipe.” 

Y/N played the good helper, listening carefully and taking directions until C-3 relaxed a little. By the time she was scooping muffin batter into the cups, he had retreated to the island to actually sit down for once. 

She slid the trays into the oven and shut the door. “What was it you said about bacon and eggs?”

C-3 instructed Y/N on how to prepare the eggs while enjoyed his tea (and maintained his posture, mind you). Poe had liked his eggs scrambled since he was a child, Han liked his fried, while both Rey and Luke refused to eat them at all. She was to make an extra fried egg “for Han,” which Leia would steal from his plate for herself. Everyone liked bacon. 

“What about Kylo? I-I mean Ben, sorry.” Y/N said. 

“He likes to make his own breakfast.” C-3 explained. 

“Oh,” Y/N nodded. 

She heard a door open and shut. Footsteps thumped faintly above them and she heard the pipes hum as someone stepped into the shower. 

“The house awakens.” She said. 

“Indeed.” C-3 smiled. “Care to help me set the table?” 

“It would be my pleasure.” 

Y/N walked out of the kitchen, hands full of napkins when she ran straight into a wall. Well, she thought it was a wall, but walls don’t smell like leather, pine, and Kylo Ren. Y/N stumbled backwards, sputtering an apology. 

“I’m sorry! I didn’t see you, Kylo–I mean Ben! Sorry...Ben.”

“Only my family calls me Ben.” He said. 

“Right, okay. So I should call you Kylo?” 

He didn’t respond, instead he narrowed his eyes like she were a bug he’d like to crush. A little intimidated, Y/N broke eye contact and fully took him in. He wore black, like always, but this time he’d donned a tank top and joggers. He must have just come back from a workout, she realized, noting the beads of sweat on his forehead and chest. Her eyes wandered over his defined chest to his arms and prominent biceps. She noticed scars on his arms and shoulders. Her gaze traced a large one that ran from his collarbone down past the neckline of his shirt. She wondered if they were from his time as a marine. Before she could ask, he pushed past her and into the kitchen, apparently fed up with her dumb stares. The distinct scent of him wafted by again. 

_ Okay, seriously, who smells good after a workout? _ She wondered with a flare of annoyance. She continued into the dining room, setting down the napkins with a little more force than strictly necessary. Y/N stopped in the kitchen doorway, poking her head in.

“Charles?” 

She ignored the way Kylo’s head shot up at her use of C-3’s real name. He was probably rolling his eyes at how lowly and simple she was. 

“Yes, Miss Y/N?” 

“I’m going to take a quick shower, I’ll be back down for breakfast in a few minutes.” 

The oven dinged. “Ah yes, there are our muffins. They’ll be just cooled enough by the time you return.” 

“Terrific.” She turned on her heel without another look in Kylo’s direction. 

“Muffin, sir?” C-3 offered after a moment. 

“No thank you, Charles.” Kylo said, his brow furrowed. 

~

Han sat back in his chair. “You’ve outdone yourself, C-3. That was the best breakfast we’ve made in a long time.” 

“Thank you, sir, but I must confess I had some help.” He gestured to Y/N with a smile. 

“Really? You made these?” Han asked. 

“With expert instruction.” Y/N affirmed. 

“Can we keep her?” Poe asked. 

Rey threw a piece of muffin at him. He caught it in his mouth, sending Y/N a wink across the table, making her laugh. Beside her, Kylo stabbed his spinach and eggwhite omelette with his fork. Y/N heard Artoo and Beebee’s collars jingling under the table as they converged on the bacon Luke had “accidentally” dropped.

“So, Y/N, if you were in Ben’s class, does that mean you’re an Economics major as well?” Leia asked, stealing a fried egg from Han’s plate. 

“No, business, actually.” She said.

Han leaned forward. “Business?” 

“Owning and operating my own restaurant or café has always been a big dream of mine.” Y/N confessed. “I’m self-taught on the culinary front, though.” 

“Well you’re a damn good teacher.” Han said. “Can you make more than cookies and breakfast?” 

“I’ve got a healthy repertoire,” Y/N said, “And I’m a quick learner.” 

“How would you like to see how to run a business up close and personal?” Han proposed. “I need an extra hand down at the bar this summer. Finn can’t tend bar and wait tables at the same time. Besides, I’ve been looking for an excuse to kick Chewie out of the kitchen.” 

“He’s an awful cook.” Finn agreed. 

“The Millenium Falcon is known for its terrible, terrible food.” Poe said, before catching his father’s glare. “ _ Great _ drinks, but terrible food.” 

“I’d be happy to help out.” Y/N said. “I don’t turn twenty-one until next spring, though. Will that be a problem?” 

“As long as you’re not the one drinking, we’ll be fine.” Han said. “We’re closed today, but why don’t you come in today to try it out. If it all goes well, you can start when we open on Monday.” 

“I can’t wait.” Y/N smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so into this story. Leave a comment if you are too!


	3. The Millenium Falcon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y/N settles in to her new job. Kylo is bad at feelings (and saying 'thank you'). Moms are the best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are you ever just overwhelmed by how much you love Adam Driver? I watch "Marriage Story" last week and I'm STILL thinking about it...  
> Ugh, he's so amazing.

“We open at noon and close at midnight Mondy through Thursday and stay open until three in the morning on Fridays and Saturdays. We’re closed Sunday. Bars on Sundays are just sad.” Han said. 

He led Y/N through the main space of the Millenium Falcon Bar and Grill. There were tables towards the middle, with space in the center for dancing. The side walls had two booths each for more private seating options. The bar lined the back wall, with plenty of stools at the counter and well-stocked shelves of alcohol behind it. There was a jukebox in the corner Y/N couldn’t wait to try. 

“The kitchen closes at nine, so you’ll only work opening until then. This is where you’ll spend most of your time.” Han pushed open the door to the kitchen. 

“Haaaaaaagh!” A very large, very hairy man greeted them. 

“Hey, Chewie.” Han smiled. “Y/N, this is Chewbacca. Chewbacca, this is Y/N.” 

“Nice to meet you.” Y/N shook his hand. 

He said something else, but Y/N couldn’t tell if it was another language, or just garbled beyond recognition. Still hoping to make a good impression, she just nodded and smiled as he showed her around the kitchen.

Han and Chewie got down to business, testing her skills. Y/N’s first task was to make burgers and fries for them for lunch. In addition to the requested fare, she brought out a selection of homemade dipping/drizzling sauces. 

“Honey mustard, pink sauce, a barbeque blend, and of course, ketchup.” She said, pointing to each one. “I have more in mind, but we didn’t have all the ingredients” 

Chewie tried each sauce, exclaiming in what Y/N could only hope was approval. His words sounds slavic. She wondered absently if Chewbacca was a Czech name. 

“We’re adding these to the permanent menu.” Han said, gesturing to the sauce. “Oh, I forgot to show you that, huh?” 

He grabbed a laminated sheet of paper from the bar. It looked like it hadn’t been redone since the 80s. Come to think of it, the whole bar seemed like it hadn’t been changed in at least thirty years. 

The menu was simple and traditional: lots of fried things with cheese. 

“While I’m adding the sauces, do you mind if I change a few other things?” Y/N asked, tentatively. 

“Starting strong.” Han noted. “Whaddya got?” 

“I’d like to swap the pasta salad with a garden salad option. I’m sure people won’t order it very often, but it’s good to put a little greenery on there.” Y/N said. “And if you think it would be a good idea, I could have a nightly special. Keep the menu a little more fresh and interesting.” 

“First off, if you want to be a business owner, never say ‘if you think it would be a good idea.’ You think it’s a good idea. Good enough.” Han said. “Second, as long as you deal with the computer stuff for the new menu, the changes are good with me.” 

He stood up, holding out his hand

“I’m looking forward to working with you, Y/N.” 

She shook his hand, grinning. “Likewise, Mr. Solo.” 

~

Y/N’s first few days at the Millenium Falcon were blessedly slow. They only had one real customer on Monday, who ordered some burgers to go. The other one was Poe, who came to visit Finn during his lunch break. Y/N had complete control of the jukebox all day. 

A group of middle aged men in suits came for lunch on Tuesday. Finn came back into the kitchen, helping Chewie bus the table. 

“They really liked the fries,” Finn mentioned. 

“Really? That’s great.” 

“Now that the food’s good business is going to pick up.” He smiled. “I might actually have to work for a living.” 

Y/N laughed. 

On Wednesday, Y/N emerged from Han’s office, where he’d taught her to put in an order with their food supplier. She would come in early on Friday to learn how to sign for it and log all the inventory with Chewie before the weekend rush started. Poe sat at the bar, holding hands with Finn over the counter. They were speaking in hushed tones, stopping to smile at her when they realized she was there. 

“Did you make these?” Poe asked, holding up a new menu. “I like ‘em.” 

Y/N smiled. “Aw, thanks.” 

“Seriously, this is my favorite font.” Poe said. 

“Mine too.” Y/N agreed. 

“How do you have a favorite font?” Finn asked. “I don’t think it matters as long as it’s not comic sans.” 

“Of course it matters!” Poe argued playfully, “No one would eat here if the menu were in...indie flower!” 

“Indie flower?” 

“Yeah, you know, the one that looks like handwriting.” Poe said. “Indie flower.” 

He gave Y/N a  _ back me up here _ look, but she just threw her hands up and backed away. Finn leaned forward, brushing Poe’s hair back. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about but you’re definitely adorable.” 

“I am, aren’t I?” Poe replied cheekily. 

Y/N decided to give them some space, heading back to the kitchen to plan the next week’s specials. 

Friday and Saturday passed in a blur as Y/N encountered her first weekend rush. Friday was crazy busy, considering the infamous food. Apparently Poe was right, the drinks were good enough to bring people in. Once word got out about the new menu, the crowd only grew on Saturday.

Y/N had never worked a kitchen on her own before, and nothing could have properly prepared her for just how hectic it all was. She thanked the heavens for Finn every time he poked his head through the window connecting the bar to the kitchen. He gave her new food orders, but always added an encouraging phrase or even a cheer to make her smile. Without him, she definitely would have cried. 

She did cry out of sheer relief (and pride) when the kitchen closed at nine. Her first big hurdle cleared without cutting off a finger or burning the bar to the ground. Finn managed to duck into the kitchen as she took off her apron. He pulled her into a hug. 

“You did it!” He said. “Now go home and rest.” 

She hugged him back, starting to tear up again at the depth of kindness this man and his amazing hugs was capable of. She pulled back, stifling a yawn. 

“You sure you’ve got this? I can stay and help wait tables if you need me.” Y/N said, peeking out at the loud patrons beyond the bar. 

“Nah, I’m good. If they get too rowdy Chewie can handle them.” He said. “Go sleep. I know you want to.” 

“Thank you, Finn.” She said, giving him one more hug. 

“Hey, what are friends for?” 

~

Y/N woke from a deep, restful sleep. It was the kind you only get after a long day. She rolled over, blinking at the clock on the bedside table. Almost twelve hours of sleep...glorious. Y/N stretched, luxuriating in the combined warmth of her bed and the summer sunlight filtering in through the window. With a smile, she remembered it was her day off. She knew exactly what she wanted to do. 

Y/N slipped out of bed, padding over to the bathroom. Freshly showered, she put on a comfortable dress out of the closet and a tote bag. She selected a book she’d been eyeing all week, dropping it into the bag along with her phone. Y/N’s good mood propelled her to the kitchen where she made toast and chatted with C-3 while he washed the breakfast dishes. Two shiny red apples joined the bag on her shoulder. She sent C-3 a goodbye over her shoulder before heading back out into the house. 

She took her time exploring, trying to commit the layout to memory. So far she only really knew where her room, the kitchen, and the dining room were. Y/N wanted to find that parlour again…

After a few minutes of adventure, she got distracted by the wall of family photos lining one of the corridors on the second floor. Y/N walked slowly down the hallway, traveling through time with each photo. There were several from when Luke, Leia, and Han were her age, smiling together and getting up to who knows what. Then meeting baby Poe, followed quickly by the arrival of Kylo. Y/N was pleasantly surprised to see how smiley Kylo was as a child. In a photo at age three or four, his dark eyes sparkled and Y/N recognized Poe’s smile as they boys embraced. She smiled at a picture of Han and his boys, sitting on the back porch. Y/N laughed out loud at the picture of Rey’s arrival at age two. She smiled for the camera, pushing both of her new brothers aside. 

After about age ten, Y/N started to see the Kylo she knew–dark and somber. As they grew older, Poe and Rey shone brighter while Kylo became a shadow in the back. Poe was valedictorian, because of course. She paused for a moment on Kylo in his military uniform. Did he still have it? She shook her head, moving on to a familiar picture of Rey at her senior prom. Y/N was about to head back the way she came when she saw movement out of the corner of her eye. 

Y/N turned around to find Kylo Ren in all his brooding glory. He frowned at her like she was a stain on his favorite shirt. The door he’d just come out of remained ajar, giving her a glimpse of what she could only guess was his room. She was surprised to see dark blue walls instead of his usual black color scheme. 

“Are those bookshelves?” 

Kylo reached behind him, shutting the door firmly. Y/N looked at her feet, embarrassed at having let her thoughts come out of her mouth. 

She cleared her throat. “Good morning, Kylo.”

“What do you want?” He asked. 

Y/N felt her chest tighten as her good mood shrank to nothing, as he stared down at her. A sense of inadequacy crept into her mind, taking hold of her. He made her feel small. And that made her angry. 

“I don’t  _ want _ anything.” She replied curtly. 

“Then why are you here?” 

He wasn’t just asking about the hallway. 

“I’m exploring.” Y/N said. “I should know my way around the house I’ll be living in for the summer.” 

“I thought you were spending all your time at the bar.” He scoffed. 

“Why do you care?” She stepped closer. “Contrary to what  _ you _ might think, my choices have nothing to do with you. You made it very clear you want nothing to do with  _ me _ , so–” 

“I didn’t say that.” He glared. “Are you always so dramatic? So someone said no to you once, that doesn’t give you–” 

“Oh, so I’ll just go tell everyone the other part of the story. How you couldn’t bear to talk to me for even  _ five  _ minutes.” She turned, as if to walk away and do just that. 

His hand encircled her upper arm. Y/N froze. 

“That’s not why I–” Kylo stopped short, noticing his hand still on her arm. 

He released his grip, curling his hands into fists at his sides and avoiding her gaze. Y/N could tell he was frustrated with his inability to find the right words to properly crush her. 

“Why do you hate me so much? What did I do to you?” She asked, anger flaring in her stomach. 

Kylo blinked, taken aback. He clenched his jaw before setting his gaze back on her face. 

“I don’t hate you.” His voice was quiet, venom gone. “I could never hate you.” 

Y/N opened her mouth and then closed it again, too surprised to speak. “Then why—”

“Thank you.” Kylo blurted, as if the words were strangling him. 

Y/N blinked. “Excuse me?” 

“For saying that to them. At dinner.” He added. 

“It was the truth.” Y/N replied, eyeing him warily. “Just not all of it.” 

Y/N held his gaze, ready for another argument to ensue. Kylo didn’t say anything else. He just brushed past her and stalked down the corridor. Y/N stepped backwards until she could lean on the wall. She felt exhausted and fragile, like she’d just fought a battle but wasn’t sure who’d won. Y/N waited a moment longer for her legs to stop wobbling (and to be sure Kylo was far away). With a deep breath, she adjusted the bag on her shoulder before continuing on her way. 

Artoo and Beebee followed her out the back door into the idyllic garden behind the house. She walked slowly, letting the bright colors and floral aromas wash away the uncertainty she felt whenever Kylo was present. Eventually she settled at the edge of the garden, where it tapered away into the treeline. Y/N sat with her back against the tall trunk with a dog on either side. She opened her book. 

After about three chapters, her phone began to buzz. She pulled it out, happy to see her mother’s name on the caller ID. 

“Hi Mom.”

“Hey sweetie!” Her mom sounded happy, making Y/N smile. 

“How’s your trip? Spent all my tuition money yet?” Y/N asked. 

“Almost. I was going to buy dinner with your senior year.” Her mom said. “Just kidding, honey, you know I would never.” 

“I know.” 

“How about you? Have you left that gorgeous room at all?” Mom asked. 

“Yeah, I have a job, actually. I’m running the kitchen at Rey’s dad’s bar.” Y/N said. 

“What? That’s amazing!” Mom cheered. “You’re not drinking, right?” 

“No, don’t worry.” Y/N rolled her eyes. “Although I might have to start if I’m this stressed out all the time.” 

“Really? Are they treating you badly? I don’t care about the money for plane fare if you need to leave and come with me–” 

“No, Mom, it’s fine.” Y/N assured her, “I was just being dramatic. Everything’s fine.” 

“What’s bothering you, sweetie? Is it the job?” 

“No, the job is great. I’m getting actual business experience, it’s just–” Y/N sighed, “Rey’s brother is...he’s…ugh, I can’t explain it.” 

Mom waited for her to continue. 

“Do you remember the guy I told you about from my Econ class?” Y/N asked. 

“The sexy one who turned out to be a jerk?” 

“I didn’t say it like that but yes, that one.” Y/N confirmed. 

“Does this brother remind you of him?” 

Y/N laughed. “Yeah he does. He is him.” 

“What? That’s crazy!” 

“I know!” Y/N said. “Turns out he’s sort of the black sheep of the family. Poe, the other brother is such a stereotypical oldest sibling. Perfect smile, perfect job, has his life together. And you know Rey, she’s engaging and charming.” 

“Very much has Harry Potter ‘chosen one’ vibes.” Mom agreed. 

“Who taught you what vibes means?” 

“Hey, I know things!” Mom laughed. “Go on.” 

“Anyway that leaves Kylo in the middle. Did I tell you he was a Marine before college? Now he’s studying Economics. He and Poe fight and Rey tends to side with Poe...It seems like Luke, their uncle, is the only one who tries to get to know him.” 

“Sounds like a tough dynamic.” 

“Yeah, but every time I start to feel bad for him he turns into that jerk from Econ class who’d rather sit alone than talk to me. I get that being the middle child is hard, but it’s not an excuse to be rude! He’s so...so...infuriating.” Y/N said. 

On the other line, Mom exhaled, thinking through her advice. “I think you should give him the benefit of the doubt.” 

“What?” 

“Sweetie, do you remember what it was like right after Dad died?” 

Y/N picked at the grass at her feet. “Not really. I remember the funeral.” 

“You had a hard time.” Mom said. “I’d get calls from your school almost every day telling me you’d talked back to the teacher or gotten into arguments with the other kids. Do you remember what they were about?” 

“No.” Y/N admitted, feeling a lump growing in her throat.

“Everyone kept trying to tell you they were sorry about your dad, or that they were there for you. But you, my little munchkin, wanted to be strong and brave so you told everyone you didn’t need their help and you’d argue and argue until they gave up. I hated that you wouldn’t let yourself feel and I was so afraid you’d never grow out of it. Obviously I was wrong, since you’re fine now.” 

“Yeah…” 

“You were a kid, which is different, I know, but maybe that’s what this Kylo guy is going through. He was a Marine! That’s gotta be traumatic. And you don’t know what else he’s been through.” Mom said. “I’m not excusing how rude he’s been to you, but I think it would be wise to try to approach him with patience and a little empathy. He might open up.” 

“Oh yeah,” Y/N said. “That’ll be the same day I call to tell you I taught the dogs to talk.” 

Mom laughed. “Maybe. Just give him a chance, okay?” 

“Okay.” Y/N agreed. “I will. Now tell me what you and Aunt Amilyn have been up to in Canto Bight.” 

~

Breakfast was subdued on Monday morning, the day of Leia’s departure for D.C. Poe talked about a mishap at Resistance Tech that had brought him into the office over the weekend. Y/N tuned him out, distracted by Artoo appearing from under the table and laying his head in her lap. She scratched behind his ears lovingly, admiring the rare iridescent blue of his eyes. 

Y/N felt a tingle at the back of her neck she only got when someone was watching her. She turned her head, meeting Kylo’s amber stare. For once, he wasn’t frowning, just merely observing. She felt a twinge of something in her chest, but she couldn’t put her finger on the exact emotion.

“I love how committed you are to your work.” Finn said, staring admiringly at Poe. 

“You were a leader from a young age, always managing everyone and everything.” Leia agreed. 

In an instant, Kylo returned to his resting angry face. He looked down at the table, his jaw clenched tightly. Y/N noticed the tension running through his entire body, from his shoulders to his feet. 

_ Give him a chance. _

“So, what do you want to do with your Economics degree?” Y/N asked. 

Kylo blinked. He appeared shocked at having been addressed directly for something other than one of Poe’s jabs. Y/N gave him her patient listener face, waiting for an answer.

“I’m considering going into the stock market. Or accounting.” He cleared his throat, “I’ve uh, I’ve been doing freelance work for a few local businesses.” 

“Really? You never said anything.” Leia said, surprised. 

“No one asked.” Luke interjected, looking knowingly at his nephew. 

“What local businesses?” Han asked. “If I had known I would have asked for some help with the books at the Falcon.” 

“You have enough help.” Kylo muttered. 

“Now what’s that supposed to mean–” 

Y/N could see Kylo beginning to retreat in on himself. Her heart hurt on his behalf, as a moment that should have been for celebrating his ambition soured. Not wanting to insert herself directly into a family matter, Y/N looked for a diversion. 

She moved her arm, knocking over her mug of tea. “Oh no!” 

The argument de-escalated right away as attention turned to her. Kylo moved quickly, reaching across her to right the mug. Y/N stood up, dabbing at the liquid with her napkin. Their hands bumped as he used his napkin to help. 

“I’m so sorry!” She said, moving out of the way as C-3 swooped in to clean the mess.

“You should have seen the messes those two made when they were kids.” Han said, gesturing between Finn and Rey. 

“Hey! We weren’t  _ that _ bad.” 

While the chatter started up again, she hazarded a look around the table to see if her ruse had been successful. They talked and laughed, the moment already forgotten by everyone.

Well, almost everyone. 

When the group separated to start their days, Leia took Y/N by the arm. 

“Could I speak with you for a moment?” 

“Of course.” Y/N said. 

Leia led her out into the garden where they strolled, arm-in-arm amongst the flowers. 

“I wanted to talk to you about a few things before I left.” She finally began, once they were a good distance from the house. “Would you be willing to take care of some things for me while I’m on the Hill?” 

“Yes, I’d love to.” 

“Can you make sure Han eats well? C-3 handles dinner nicely, but I know you do lunch at the Falcon. You’d think having a heart attack would make him wise up a bit but no. Then again, that husband of mine has never been one to do what’s expected.” Leia chuckled. 

“Yes ma’am.” Y/N said. “Low fat diet and no red meat starts today.” 

“Excellent.” Leia smiled. “Now, I have one more favor to ask because you strike me as someone who is understanding beyond her years. Will you look out for Ben? 

“I’m not sure at this point what I did wrong as a parent or what it is about him or maybe a combination of both, but he...he has a hard time with people. But I think you know how to handle him. You proved that the first night you were here when you talked about how smart you thought he was and just now when you brought him out of his shell for a moment and saved him and Han from another one of their skirmishes,” She leaned closer, “Yes, of course I noticed your little diversion. I wish some of my colleagues in Congress had half of your tact and ingenuity.” 

Y/N laughed, embarrassed by the unexpected praise. Leia stopped walking, turning to speak to Y/N face to face. 

“You see Ben, the real Ben, for who he is. I think you can get him to knock down those walls he’s built.” 

“I’ll try.” Y/N promised. 

Leia smiled. “A friend of mine once told me: ‘you cannot try, you must simply do.’” 

She patted Y/N’s hand, guiding them back through the garden. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to Nyvera! Love you, girl.


	4. Warming Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summer marches onward as Y/N and Kylo grow closer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Highly recommend listening to some Hozier while you read this story. It's pretty much the only thing I listen to while I've been working on this story.

Before work, Y/N found herself back in the corridor with the photographs. She looked at them all again, trying consciously not to linger on a certain pair of brown eyes. As she moved down the hall, she began to glance at the door at the end. 

“He’s not here.” 

She jumped slightly, pressing her hand to her chest. Luke chuckled, coming to stand next to Y/N, looking back down memory lane. 

“Who’s not here?” 

He gave her a look. “He’s in town with one of his clients.” 

Y/N hummed in acknowledgement. 

“There is so much of Han in that kid,” Luke said, “And his mom too. A recipe for stubbornness and pride.” 

Y/N laughed. “That sounds about right.” 

“He was a sweet kid,” Luke picked up one of the rare smiling pictures of Kylo, “Always saw into people, understood them. Ben could spot a weakness faster than anyone and try to help people. Big hugger, that kid.” 

Y/N looked at the photo of Poe and Kylo embracing. 

“How did it all change so much?” 

“Gradually, like most important things.” Luke said. “Leia went into politics and was around less, Han was still in business. A lot of ‘not right now, honey’ and ‘maybe later’ started. Poe’s a different kind of kid, he could push through and make them see him. Rey has always known how to make people pay attention. But Ben...he, well he’s Ben. He pulled away. He kept that intuitive streak, but he started using it to lash out instead of helping.” 

“Why does he push people away?” 

“Somewhere he got it into his head that he doesn’t deserve friendship or love,” Luke said, “But deep down, I don’t think he wants to be alone.” 

~

Y/N knocked on the door to Han’s office. 

“Yeah,” He called, “Come in

She shouldered the door open, balancing a plate of salad in her hands. Han didn’t look up as she entered, fully focused on the papers on his desk. Y/N set the plate down in front of him. 

“What is this?” He stared at the greenery with disdain.

“Salad.” She said. 

“Yeah, I can see that. What’s in it?” 

“Delicious things.” She said with a smile. “If I tell you anything else you won’t eat it.” 

“Fair enough.” Han picked up his fork begrudgingly.

Y/N left him to his work, getting the kitchen prepped for the evening and chatting with Finn. 

“Did Han tell you he’s thinking about shortening our hours?” Finn asked. 

“He is? Why?” 

Finn gestured around the space. A family of four sat at one of the booths eating lunch and a couple held hands while they picked a song on the jukebox. 

“Your food is bringing a few more customers, but it’s still basically a ghost town until Friday and Saturday. Han said he might stay closed until Wednesdays to save on utilities.” Finn said. 

“That seems like a slippery slope to staying closed permanently.” Y/N frowned. 

“I know.” Finn agreed. “I’ve been thinking of things we could try to keep the place afloat, though. We could have something special on weekdays to draw people in. Like Open Mic Mondays, Trivia Night Tuesday...I haven’t thought of anything for Wednesday yet, but you get the idea.” 

“Finn, those sound amazing!” 

“Yeah, but Han hasn’t changed anything about this place in my entire lifetime. He’s not going to start now.” Finn said dejectedly. 

“I don’t know...he seems like the type to do exactly what you’d expect him not to.” Y/N covered Finn’s hand with her own. “You should give it a shot. If I can get him to eat a salad, you can convince him to save this bar.” 

Chewbacca walked by and thumped Y/N on the back so hard she nearly fell over. He gave her a big grin as he hollered something unintelligible. There was a big piece of lettuce in his teeth. 

“I think Chewie liked the salad too.” Finn laughed. 

~

Y/N sat on the edge of the garden with her back against a tree. Her eyes were closed as she breathed. In and out. In and out. In and out. She felt the ground beneath her, the tree trunk at her back, and the sky above. She sat, simultaneously aware and unaware as the sky moved from the pink of sunrise to the clear blue of morning. Y/N’s eyes remained closed as footsteps approached. They faltered for a moment as if surprised to see her, before settling at a tree nearby. They sat in silence for a good while longer, meditating in the first light of the day. 

As she began to feel the first pangs of hunger in her stomach, Y/N let awareness flow back into her body, from her head to her toes. She stretched and stood, turning to look at her companion. This time, it was her turn to falter. 

Kylo Ren sat against the tree next to her, legs crossed and eyes closed. He wore a black hoodie and black joggers, likely from his morning workout. Perhaps it was the height advantage, or the rare look of peace on his face, but Y/N didn’t feel intimidated. No confusing swirl of sympathy and irritation. As she watched the gentle rise and fall of his breath, Y/N realized how calming his presence was. 

Kylo opened his eyes. His brown eyes were soft and vulnerable as he looked at her. She held his gaze. Y/N felt off-balance, like she was steadily tipping forward, destined to fall into the deep amber pools in front of her. 

In the distance, a door slammed as C-3 let the dogs out into the yard. Y/N started, snapping out of her trance. 

“I didn’t mean to disturb you.” She said. 

“You didn’t.” 

“Oh,” She blinked, “Well, um, good morning.” 

A bemused smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “Good morning.” 

His voice sent a shiver down her spine. She wanted him to say good morning to her with a smile like that every day. 

Y/N shook herself away from  _ that _ thought, nodding awkwardly. “Did you sleep well?” 

His smile grew, causing crinkles at the corners of his eyes. He was disarmingly handsome when he smiled. Y/N felt a flutter of pride, knowing  _ she _ had made the ever stoic Kylo Ren smile. 

_Ben_ , she realized, _This is Ben Solo. Not Kylo Ren._

“I did.” He said. “How was your night in the tower?” 

“Good, it was good.” She said. “I managed to resist staying up all night reading.” 

“What do you read? Cookbooks?” 

He was teasing her. Joy flooded her chest. Maybe Leia was right about this whole mission of befriending him. 

“No, I read a lot of things: mystery, nonfiction, fiction, fantasy. Nineteenth century literature is my favorite, though.” She said. 

“And Austen is the favorite of the favorites?” 

“With Alcott close behind.” Y/N smiled. “You’re well-versed.” 

“You sound surprised.” 

“I am,” She laughed. “I’m starting to wonder which kind of books you actually help small businesses with. You should come to the Falcon and help me with mine instead of your dad.” 

As the smile dropped from his face, Y/N’s heart dropped into her shoes. 

_ Shit. Shouldn’t have said that.  _

He stood up, brow furrowed. Ben disappeared as a dark and stormy Kylo Ren took his place. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean–if it’s a sore subject, I–” Y/N fumbled for words, desperate to make him smile again. 

“It has nothing to do with you.” His voice was harsh. “I have to go to work.” 

Kylo brushed past her. She watched him walk away as the walls around him rose again and locked her out.

~

“Have you ever wondered about your biological parents?” 

Y/N and Rey lay sprawled on the living room sofa, binging Netflix with Finn and Poe. 

“Sometimes,” Rey said, chewing a handful of popcorn, “But they gave me up and now I have pretty great parents, so I haven’t really looked back.” 

“I found mine.” Poe said. 

“What? You didn’t tell me that!” Rey exclaimed. 

“Yeah, I tracked them down a couple of years ago. My birth mother lives in Guatemala and my birth father died in prison there ten years ago.” He said. “I wrote my mother a letter, but she never replied.” 

Finn squeezed his hand, pressing a kiss to his boyfriend’s forehead.

“Poe, I’m so sorry.” Y/N said. 

“Don’t be.” Poe smiled. “The whole experience made me more grateful for Mom and Dad. We are incredibly fortunate to be in this family and I try not to forget that, or let my upbringing change me.” 

“What do you mean?” Y/N sat up. 

“Hey now Mr. Oldest Brother,” Rey said, “Don’t pretend you don’t take advantage of being the family’s golden boy.” 

“I wasn’t talking about  _ you. _ ” Poe said, throwing a pillow at her. 

Y/N crossed her arms. “Who are you talking about?” 

“Look, we all know Ben can act a little ungrateful sometimes. He’s surly and he throws tantrums and never recognizes how good he has it. And I–” 

“Poe I don’t want to be rude, but how can you say all of that about your brother? Do you ever ask him if he’s okay or why he’s so angry all the time? Or did you just assume that he’s just jealous of you? Maybe he is, but he’s also a complex human being with more emotions than he shows on the outside. He was a Marine for God’s sake! Do you have any idea what he must have seen and done during service? Have you asked? I don’t mean to say that he’s easy to handle because I know he’s not, but until you’ve tried and I mean  _ really _ tried to get to know your brother, you shouldn’t villainize him like you do.” 

Poe opened his mouth to argue and then closed it. He opened it again. And closed it. 

“I don’t mean to intrude on your family’s matters but I felt I had to say something.” Y/N added. 

Finn nodded. “Well somebody had to.” 

Y/N felt a tingle at the back of her neck, like someone was watching her. She turned to find the doorway empty but for the flash of a long shadow retreating down the hallway. 

~

Y/N helped C-3 carry out the platters of toast, eggs, and fruit salad for breakfast. She moved to the cabinet, getting out plates to set the table when she heard voices down the hallway. One was instantly recognizable, the deep dulcet tones sending a shiver down her spine. Y/N stopped in her tracks when she realized who the other was. 

Kylo and Poe rounded the corner together, entering the dining room. They stopped their uncharacteristically calm conversation when they saw her. 

“Good morning, darlin’!” Poe said, kissing her on the cheek. 

Y/N looked between the two brothers, completely speechless. Kylo looked down, but Y/N could have sworn she saw that smile tugging at his mouth again. 

“I–well, good morning!” Y/N finally managed, shaking her head. 

“That smells  _ good _ !” Rey said, joining them. “Nothing is better than buttered toast.” 

She grabbed a piece and took a huge bite. 

“I seem to recall your mother teaching you to wait for everyone else before eating. Good thing she’s not here, huh.” Han winked, moving to take his seat.

Y/N walked back around the table to her seat. Kylo moved faster, pulling the chair out for her. She looked up at him in ever-growing surprise. His face was inscruitible as always, but Y/N was glad to see the furrow absent from his brow. 

“Thank you.” 

He pushed the chair in, leaning over her shoulder. 

“You’re welcome.” He said softly, only for her to hear. 

He took his seat beside her and began breakfast, apparently unaware of the flustered woman next to him as she fumbled with her fork. 

~

_ Flatbread Pizza _

_ Tacos _

_ Mac and Cheese…. _

Y/N twirled her pen, writing up the specials menu for the next week. She flipped through the recipe books on the desk. 

_ Stuffed Green Peppers  _

Y/N copied down the ingredients for the supply order. While she scribbled, she heard a noise on the spiral staircase to her room. No one knocked on the door or came inside. Y/N got up and opened the door, half expecting Rey to be standing there making a goofy face. 

Instead, she found no one. Y/N stepped forward to look down the stairs when her foot bumped a book on the threshold. She knew it was Tolstoy from the heft alone, but the ornate cover confirmed her suspicions. Y/N walked back into her room with  _ Anna Karenina _ , shutting the door behind her. She curled up in the window seat and opened the front cover. A small piece of paper was tucked into the seam. 

_ “I took this from the tower a long time ago. I want you to have it–in the tower, at the Falcon, back at school, wherever you want to take it. You’ll understand it better than I can. You understand everything better than I can.  _

_ – B”  _

Y/N flipped through the pages, remembering the wonderful intertwining narratives. Passages here and there were underlined in black pen. Y/N brushed her fingers over the words. 

_ “He was afraid of defiling the love which filled his soul.” _

_ “‘My principal sin is doubt. I doubt everything, and am in doubt most of the time.’” _

_ “He could not be mistaken. There were no other eyes like those in the world. There was only one creature in the world who could concentrate for him all the brightness and meaning of life. It was she.” _

Y/N shut the book. She held it to her chest, breathing in the smell of old paper, leather, and pine. 

~

“Look at the fireflies!” Rey said, pointing up into the sky. 

Y/N squinted, trying to distinguish sparks from the bonfire and the nighttime bugs. The fire was Finn’s idea, to celebrate a successful first Trivia Tuesday. Rey, Poe, and Y/N had agreed immediately, fantasizing about s’mores and stargazing. On their way outside, Y/N took a short detour, slipping a note under the door at the end of the hallway. 

_ “Anna and I have decided to leave the tower for a little while for a bonfire in the backyard. Levin is welcome to join if he’d like. There will be s’mores. _

_ -Y/N” _

“Oh, I see them!” Y/N exclaimed, getting out of her lawn chair to chase the lighting bugs.

She ran through the grass after the flashing light. Y/N reached out, nearly grabbing it, when she ran straight into a tree. Well, a relatively soft tree with arms to catch and steady her. She looked up at Kylo, entranced. The light from the house illuminated him from behind, turning his hair into a halo. It looked so soft, and she fought the urge to run a hand through it. Y/N stepped back, brushing herself off. 

“I really have to stop doing that.” 

“Chasing fireflies?” 

“Running into you. It probably hurts.” Y/N said sheepishly. 

“I don’t mind.” Kylo headed towards the fire. 

“Oh, Ben!” Rey greeted. “I didn’t think you’d come out of your room.” 

Kylo pressed his lips together, fists clenched at his sides. Y/N caught Rey’s gaze. 

“But we’re glad you’re here!” Rey added, “Want a s’more? I just found some good sticks for toasting them…” 

They laughed while Rey told a story about one of her Physics seminars, complete with a spot-on impression of the professor. A breeze blew through the trees, and a shudder when through Y/N’s body. She pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs and regretting leaving her sweater in the tower. 

While Rey demonstrated how badly her professor spat when speaking, Kylo pulled his hoodie over his head. Y/N couldn’t help but look as his black tee shirt clung to the fabric, revealing his stomach. He stood up, and her head snapped back to the fire and Rey’s performance.

Warmth engulfed her in an instant. She looked up in surprise as he draped the hoodie around her shoulders. His eyes looked golden in the firelight, the vulnerable look from their morning in the forest on his face. Kylo didn’t say anything, he just returned to his seat, listening quietly to Rey’s story. Y/N pulled the hoodie over her head, overwhelmed by the warmth and comfort of him. 

They called it a night around three in the morning, dowsing the fire and trudging back inside. Somehow, Y/N made it up all the stairs and fell into bed. She fell into the deepest, most satisfying sleep she’d had in a long time, curled up in Kylo’s hoodie. 


	5. A Dark and Stormy Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feelings get complicated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was my favorite chapter to write. I hope you like it!

Y/N fumbled with her key, unlocking the door under the dim glow of the porch light. It finally turned and she walked inside. Exhausted, Y/N trudged towards the stairs. She stifled a yelp as a figure rose out of the darkness in front of her. 

“Kylo! Jesus, you gave me a heart attack!” Y/N hissed, pressing a hand to her chest. 

“It’s three-thirty in the morning. You come back at ten. I was...worried.” He admitted.  __

“Finn is away for the weekend with Poe. I’m helping Chewie with waiting tables and the bar.” Y/N explained, smiling.

Kylo said nothing (as usual), but didn’t move out of the way. 

“Look, I’d love to stand here with you until the sun rises, but I’m about to fall asleep on my feet so…” 

“Right.” Kylo cleared his throat, stepping aside. 

“Good night, Kylo.” Y/N said with a yawn, patting him on the shoulder. 

“Good night, Y/N.” His voice was soft, contemplative.

~

When the kitchen closed at nine on Saturday, Y/N swapped her freshly stained white apron for a black one and headed out into the bar. Classic rock and the thunderous murmur if the crowd drowned out the rolls of actual thunder from the storm outside. 

Chewie exclaimed loudly when he saw her, glad for some help battling the rowdy patrons. Y/N had spent enough time at the Falcon to understand the basics of his bizarre dialect. 

“Table duty, I’m on it.” She nodded. 

He slid two drinks towards her, calling out a number. She grabbed them and put them on a tray, balancing it with one hand. 

Thus, the rhythm began. She took orders, relayed them, and brought the drinks back. Repeat. 

“Thank you, enjoy your night!” She called to a couple who’d been feeling generous. 

She cleared their booth and bussed the dishes. She flipped to a clean page in her notepad before checking the time. Only midnight. Missing the kitchen, Y/N turned around to get back into the rhythm. She stopped short, meeting the intense amber gaze of the familiar dark haired man sitting at the next table. 

“Whiskey, neat.” He said. “Please.” 

“Coming right up.” Y/N nodded, stumbling over her feet at she moved back to the bar. 

Y/N set the glass down on his table a moment later. Her heart rate sped up as her eyes swept from the freckles on his face to the black shirt stretched across his shoulders to his dark, well-fitting jeans, all the way to the black boots on his feet. Y/N snapped back to his face, finding a hint of a smile on his lips. She hesitated for a moment, questions on the tip of her tongue. 

“You’re working.” Kylo said, calmly. “Don’t let me interrupt.” 

Y/N smiled. “Let me know if I can get you anything else.” 

“Oh, I will.” His tone changed, the pitch deeper as he looked at her with a whole new expression. 

A spark of warmth traveled through her body. She swallowed thickly, tearing her gaze away from his dark eyes. Y/N returned to work, repressing the desire building in her stomach. 

After an hour, she still couldn’t shake her constant awareness of him– his presence in the room, his gaze on her back. Y/N was constantly calculating how many steps it would take to reach him, to push his hair back with her hands and make him look at her and—

“Hey, sweetheart! Hey, can we get another round of beers over here?” 

Y/N sighed, plastering on a nice fake smile as she turned to the group of loud middle-aged men dominating the central table space. 

“Same brew, gentlemen, or would you like to try something different?” Y/N asked. 

“I’d like a little sample of you.” The one closest to her sneered, a lock of greasy, thinning hair flopping across his forehead. 

“Sorry. Not on the menu.” Y/N said, covering her discomfort with a laugh. “Nice try though. I’ll be right back with those beers.” 

“I certainly hope so, sweetheart.” He smirked, flashing yellow teeth. 

Y/N passed Kylo on her way to the bar. He’d turned his attention away from her, focusing in on the creep. The thunder in his expression calmed slightly as she brushed her hand against his arm. He turned to look at her while she told Chewie the order. She sent him a reassuring smile. This was nothing she couldn’t handle. 

Y/N handed the beers out, careful not to make physical contact with any of the drunken men. 

“Thanks, sweetheart.” The creep winked. 

Y/N didn’t reply. She just moved on as quickly as possible. 

At about one-thirty, the jukebox started skipping, stuttering in the middle of “Highway to Hell.” Y/N wiped her hands on her apron and headed over to take a look. A quarter was stuck in the slot. With a little nudge from her knee, it slid down and the song continued. She turned to go, but a body blocked her path. 

The creep smiled at her, leaning closer to trap her against the jukebox. He fed it a quarter and selected a song. His arms were hairy and his shirt had a ketchup stain on the chest. The creep leaned against the machine, making Y/N back up against the wall to avoid being touched by his protruding beer belly. 

“When do you get off, sweetheart? I was hoping to discuss some potential menu items with you…” 

“I have plans, sorry.” Y/N said. 

“At two in the morning? I doubt it. Come on, don’t play games with me, Princess—”

“Don’t call me princess.” Y/N said. “Look, how many times do I have to say it before you get the hint? I’m not interested.” 

“Ooh, feisty. I like ‘em with a little fire.” 

The creep grabbed her wrist, pulling her close. Y/N got a disgusting whiff of sweat and beer. He grabbed her butt with his other hand, squeezing. Y/N felt like throwing up. She reached back, grabbing his wrist and wrenching his hand away from her. He cried out in pain, stumbling backwards. His smile faded, replaced with anger as he pulled his arm back to strike her. 

The creep didn’t have a chance to make contact before he was pulled from behind and thrown across a nearby table. The creep’s friends were up in an instant. Kylo’s eyes glowed with rage. He stepped in front of Y/N, puffing out his chest and widening his shoulders to block them from getting any closer. The creep stumbled to his feet. 

“Back off, asshole.” Kylo warned. 

The creep paid him no heed barreling at Kylo with a drunken yell. Kylo met him with a punch to the nose, knocking the man to the ground. Creep flailed, nose gushing blood onto the floor. Kylo bent down, grabbing him by the collar and punching him again. And again. And again. 

“Hey! What the fuck is going on?” Han pushed his way through the concerned onlookers to find his son. 

He pulled Kylo away from him, looking like he might just punch Kylo in the face. “Ben! Jesus Christ, get off of him! What the hell—” 

“It’s not his fault!” Y/N put a hand on Kylo’s shoulder, gently pushing him out of the way. “He was protecting me.” 

“That  _ scum _ assaulted her.” Kylo spat, gesturing to the creep and his bleeding nose. 

“Shit.” Han turned to the creep’s friends. “Get him the hell out of my bar. Right now.” 

They helped him up, fleeing with their tails between their legs. 

“We’re closing early.” Han announced. “Everybody out.” 

Too shocked to protest, the rest of the patrons filed out, whispering and murmuring. Y/N felt the adrenaline from the fight drain from her system. She looked down at her hands to find them shaking. She stumbled backwards, light-headed. 

“Hey.” Kylo turned to her, concern etched across his face. 

He reached for her, warm hands steadying her as he guided her to sit down. His hands lingered on her body, gently grasping her shoulders. 

“I’ve got you.” His voice was gentle. “You’re safe. I won’t let you get hurt.” 

Y/N nodded, emotion rising in her throat. Tears pricked at her eyes as her breathing hitched. 

“Take her home.” Han said. 

Y/N shook her head, trying to stand on wobbling legs. “I can’t leave you to close up without me—”

“No.” Han and Kylo spoke with the same firm tone. 

“Go on home. Chewie and I will handle this.” Somehow she knew he wasn’t just talking about the mess of knocked over tables and spilled drinks. 

She nodded, too exhausted and fragile to put up a fight. Kylo guided her to the back door with a warm, steady hand on her lower back. He grabbed a black umbrella from the lost and found to shield her from the pouring rain as they walked to his car. He opened the door for her and helped her in before shutting it and dashing around to his side of the car. He slipped into the front seat, making sure she was buckled in before turning the key. 

The hum of the engine calmed Y/N down. She took several deep breaths. Kylo remained silent as ever. For the first time, Y/N realized the comfort of his silence—he was the quiet supporter, strong and steady. She exhaled, relaxing into the safety of his presence. 

They pulled into the driveway of Skywalker Ranch. Kylo shut off the engine. The steady drum of summer rain surrounded the car like a shroud. Kylo let his hands fall in his lap, looking out at the dark windows of the mansion. Y/N didn’t move, not ready to leave their little sanctuary. 

“I like your car.” She said, gently brushing the inside of the door with her hand. “I don’t know anything about cars, but I know this one is beautiful.” 

“‘76 Ford Maverick.” He said, touching the dashboard. “I fixed it up the summer after my last tour.” 

Y/N nodded. She watched a raindrop run down the window, following its stuttering path across the glass. She rubbed at her wrist, remembering the creep’s harsh grasp and the sour smell of his breath on her face. A lump formed in her throat and her eyes shone as she turned to Kylo. He was watching her carefully, eyes warm and full of tenderness. The openness and concern in his face touched her deeply. She blinked, letting a few tears slip down her cheeks. 

“Thank you. For back there. I—” Her voice broke. 

“Shhhh,” Kylo reached out, brushing away her tears. “You don’t have to thank me.” 

“N-no, no, I do. You didn’t have to do that for me. You—”

“I did. I did have to. I did it for you, Y/N.” He held her face in his hands, caressing her cheek with his thumb. 

She leaned into his touch, chasing the warmth of his calloused hands. Y/N reached up, covering his hand with her smaller one. She pulled his hand away, brushing her lips against his palm, a ghost of a kiss. She looked up at him, hoping to find some answers. He watched her with careful concentration. 

“You have your Control Face on.” She said, smiling. 

“Control Face?” 

“Yeah, it’s the face you make when Poe says something snarky or when we argue in the hallway. Like you’re trying to hold back, like you’re trying not to feel.” Y/N traced the lines on his palm before looking back up at him. “You don’t have to hold back, Kylo.” 

He pulled his hands out of her grasp, looking out the window. 

“You don’t understand.” 

“Then explain it to me.” Y/N pleaded, touching his cheek. “Don’t shut me out again.” 

He looked at her, tracing her face with his gaze like he wanted to memorize it. Kylo leaned forward and for just a moment, she thought he would kiss her. Then he pulled back. 

“It’s better this way.” 

He opened the door and got out. Y/N tried to follow him, but he moved faster. She stood, letting the cold rain soak through her clothes as he disappeared into the storm. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thinking about writing something for Charlie Barber (Marriage Story)...let me know in the comments if you'd read that. 
> 
> More to come next week!


	6. Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From Kylo's perspective.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks, as always to my beloved beta reader Nyvera, but especially for her help on this chapter. Love you, sis!!

Kylo sat in his room. That’s all he’d been doing for the last two days, just sitting and reading, and thinking. Staying up there wasn’t so bad. He had a good view of the garden, he could hear when people spoke downstairs and footsteps when they were upstairs–perfect for timing when to slip out for a run or a quick trip the kitchen for food. He knew he was acting like a stupid teenager, but he’d hide here until the end of time if holing up in his room like a moody kid was what it took to stay away from  _ her _ . 

Kylo sighed as his mind filled with images of her: her face, her hands, her nose, her  _ smile. _ He let his latest distraction,  _ Station Eleven _ , slip from his grasp as he flopped backwards on his bed. He might be successfully avoiding her, but he’d been a fool if he thought he could get her out of his head. 

“Fuck!” He groaned, remembering. 

_ Professor Calrissian turned away from the board and instructed the class to pair up for discussion. Kylo kept his head down as he always did when they were forced to make groups. The rest of the class knew better than to ask him. The back of his neck tingled. Someone was watching him. He looked to his left in time to see her look away.  _ Fourth time this week _ , he counted. Kylo picked up his pencil, drawing the symbol in the margin of his notebook.  _

_ “Um, Kylo?”  _

Shit.  _ He shut the notebook.  _

_ “Would you,” Y/N swallowed, “Would you like to be my discussion partner?”  _

_ He looked up at her. His gaze tracked from her head to her toes and back up. She looked so soft, with her deep purple sweater bunched around her hands like paws and her tentative smile. Her sneakers were clean, but well-worn. She smelled like freshly baked cookies. His chest tightened. He tore his eyes away, staring at the board before he fell further.  _

_ “No.” He said. _

_ “Oh…” She said, betrayed by the wobbliness of her own voice. “Okay, then. Um, have a good day.”  _

_ Kylo’s chest ached as she walked back to her seat. He glanced over, watching as tears dropped onto her notebook paper.  _

Fuck.  _ He took a deep breath.  _ It’s for the best. You would have hurt her anyway, this way it’s only for a second and she’ll move on. She’s better without you. Everyone is. Never forget that. 

“It’s better this way.” He reminded himself. 

He ran a hand down his face and got up, moving to the window. He looked out at the garden, watching Beebee and Artoo run through the rows of flowers towards the treeline. He hadn’t been out to meditate since the storm. Seeing her was too much of a possibility, too much of a risk. 

_ He walked towards the trees, watching the sky go from pink to pale blue. He looked down again and faltered.  _ What was she doing there? 

_ She wore an old tee shirt that was too big for her, the neck falling past her shoulder and exposing her skin. Absently, he wondered what she would look like wearing one of his shirts. Y/N’s eyes remained closed, unaware or unbothered by his presence.  _ Fuck it.  _ He decided, settling down at his tree. He took several deep breaths, letting his awareness of her body beside his meld into his awareness of the ground, the sky, and the air. They sat in silence for a while, meditating in the first light of the day.  _

_ Awareness of her began to take over again as she stretched and stood. She didn’t walk away. He felt the tingle of her gaze as it swept over him. _

_ Kylo opened his eyes, looking up at her. Her expression was open, full of curiosity. She held his gaze. He liked that about her, how she didn’t back away from him. His legs itched to stand, to be close to her.  _

_ In the distance, a door slammed as C-3 let the dogs out into the yard. Kylo shook himself, repressing his impulses.  _

_ “I didn’t mean to disturb you.” She said.  _

_ “You didn’t.” He assured her.  _

_ “Oh,” She blinked, “Well, um, good morning.”  _

_ Warmth bloomed in his chest.  _ God, she was cute.  _ A bemused smile tugged at the corners of his mouth.  _

_ “Good morning.” He replied.  _

_ Her expression changed slightly, showing a different kind of curiosity all together. He pushed back the urge to reach out and touch her.  _

_ “Did you sleep well?”  _

_ His smile grew, he couldn’t help it. “I did. How was your night in the tower?”  _

_ “Good, it was good.” She said. “I managed to resist staying up all night reading.”  _

_ He wanted to know everything about her. Favorite song, least favorite food, where she grew up, whether she had anyone to take care of her the way she takes care of everyone else.  _

_ “What do you read? Cookbooks?” He kept the rest of the questions at bay.  _

_ “No, I read a lot of things: mystery, nonfiction, fiction, fantasy. Nineteenth century literature is my favorite, though.”  _

_ He remembered the book peeking out of her bag in class everyday.  _

_ “And Austen is the favorite of the favorites?”  _

_ “With Alcott close behind.” Y/N smiled. “You’re well-versed.” _

_ She was impressed. He impressed her. Like an addict chasing relief, he wanted more, more more.  _

_ “You sound surprised.”  _

_ “I am,” She laughed. “I’m starting to wonder which kind of books you actually help small businesses with. You should come to the Falcon and help me with mine instead of your dad.”  _

Dad. Shit. 

_ The smile dropped from his face as reality came crashing back in. He was dangerous, a ticking time-bomb. He can’t do this, not with anyone, but especially not with her. He stood up, desperate for escape.  _

_ “Sorry, I didn’t mean–if it’s a sore subject, I–” Y/N stuttered.  _

_ “It has nothing to do with you. I have to go to work.” His voice was harsh. Harsher than he meant. _

_ Kylo brushed past her, the smell of freshly baked cookies following him like an unbreakable tether leading back to her.  _

Kylo went back to his book, concentrating on the story. By the time the sun began to slip past the horizon, turning the sky orange and pink, he’d finished it. Kylo returned the book to his shelf, brushing the empty space previously occupied by  _ Anna Karenina.  _ He checked the time. Seven o’clock. It was probably safe to go make a sandwich or something. She’d still be at the bar until ten. He shook his head, trying not to imagine what or  _ who _ was there with her. 

_ He’d gotten so accustomed to the sound of her footsteps up to the tower every night at the same time. On Friday when an hour, then two, then three passed without her return home, worry began clawing at his chest. He flicked on the porch light in case she came back. He paced in the living room, fighting his nagging sense of uncertainty, the possibility of her lying in a ditch somewhere… _

_ Kylo sat down on the stairs, rationalizing that she was her own woman, with friends and plans and a life that has nothing to with him. Worry won out in the end, and he was about to get in his car and drive the town looking for her when the door opened.  _

_ He stood up, and she jumped a little, frightened.  _

_ “Kylo! Jesus, you gave me a heart attack!” Y/N hissed, pressing a hand to her chest.  _

_ “It’s three-thirty in the morning. You come back at ten. I was…worried.” He admitted before he could regret the words.  _

_ “Finn is away for the weekend with Poe. I’m helping Chewie with waiting tables and the bar.” Y/N explained, smiling.  _

_ Kylo said nothing, fighting the urge to _ _ pull her into his chest and never let her go. _

_ “Look, I’d love to stand here with you until the sun rises, but I’m about to fall asleep on my feet, so…”  _

I’d catch you and carry you to bed.  _ He shook his head.  _ No, no. Nothing to do with me. 

_ “Right.” Kylo cleared his throat, stepping aside.  _

_ “Good night, Kylo.” Y/N said with a yawn, patting him on the shoulder.  _

_ “Good night, Y/N.” He said softly, wishing it didn’t have to be this way.  _

_ The next night, the decision to go to the bar was easy. He could go back there and face it. For her. He promised himself he wouldn’t get in the way, he was just there to make sure nothing bad happened to her. She wouldn’t even notice him.  _

_ Except she did.  _

_ She faltered when she saw him, a surprised smile spreading across her face. She was so beautiful.  _

_ “Whiskey, neat.” He said, playing it cool. “Please.”  _

_ “Coming right up.” Y/N nodded, stumbling over her feet at she moved back to the bar.  _

_ Y/N set the glass down on his table a moment later. She lingered, checking him out. Pride swelled in his chest to know she was attracted to him. He smiled, meeting her gaze as her eyes returned to his. _

_ “You’re working.” Kylo said, calmly. “Don’t let me interrupt.”  _

_ Y/N smiled, that look of dark curiosity returning to her face. “Let me know if I can get you anything else.”  _

_ “Oh, I will.” His tone changed involuntarily, the pitch deepening.  _

_ He watched her walk away, taking a sip of his whiskey. Kylo couldn’t deny the satisfaction that rose whenever she glanced back at him. Maybe she would… _

_ His daydream soured at the sight of her talking to a sleazy drunk a few tables over. She smiled, but Kylo knew it was fake. His blood boiled as the creep smiled at her. He stared daggers at the man, willing his head to explode.  _

_ She passed Kylo on her way to the bar, brushing her hand against his shoulder and sending warmth down his arm. She smiled at him, calming his anger momentarily. _

_ His protective instincts flared again when the creep pinned her by the jukebox. Kylo was on his feet immediately. The creep groped her and Kylo’s vision went red. He ran, reaching them in a matter of steps as the scumbag pulled back to hit her.  _

_ Kylo grabbed his arm, pulling him away and throwing him into the nearest table. Kylo could have killed him. He was seriously considering it when he saw the creep’s friends closing in. Lucky for them, he knew his priorities.  _

_ Kylo stepped in front of Y/N, puffing out his chest and widening his shoulders to block them from getting any closer. He’d die before he let them touch her. The creep stumbled to his feet.  _

_ “Back off, asshole.” Kylo growled in warning.  _

_ The drunk came at him anyway. Kylo met him with an easy punch to the nose, knocking the man to the ground. Without a second thought Kylo was on him, throwing punch after punch. He could fight all night if he had to.  _

_ “Hey! What the fuck is going on?”  _

_ Han wrenched him back, away from the creep. “Ben! Jesus Christ, you refuse to come here and then you start a fucking bar fight? What the hell—”  _

_ Kylo inhaled, trying to calm down before starting another argument with his father.  _

_ “It’s not his fault!” Y/N put a hand on Kylo’s shoulder, gently pushing him out of the way. “He was protecting me.”  _

_ He felt stronger, remaining close to her, heart pounding with protectiveness.  _

_ “That scum assaulted her.” Kylo spat, gesturing to the creep and his bleeding nose.  _

_ “Shit.” Han turned to the creep’s friends. “Get him the hell out of my bar. Right now.”  _

_ Kylo’s attention turned to her immediately, concern taking over. She swayed slightly, shaken. His heart sank into his stomach.  _ She was afraid of him.  __

_ “Hey.” He reached for her, steadying her as he guided her to sit down. His hands lingered on her body, gently grasping her shoulders.  _

_ “I’ve got you.” He promised. “You’re safe. I won’t let you get hurt.”  _

_ Y/N nodded. Unshed tears shone in her eyes. He wanted to pick her up and carry her far away from here, from everyone and everything that could hurt her. _

_ “Take her home.” Han said.  _

_ Y/N shook her head, trying to stand. “I can’t leave you to close up without me—” _

_ “No.” Han and Kylo spoke at the same time.  _

_ Kylo pushes away his irritation at his father, focusing on her.  _

_ “Go on home. Chewie and I will handle this.” Han said.  _

_ Kylo helped her to the car, gripping the steering wheel tightly as he drove. He thought about his nights on deployment, after long difficult days. The others would try to talk to him, to placate and reassure. All he wanted was silence, to be wrapped and protected in it. He remained quiet, hoping to provide her with the same comfort he’d craved. When they arrived at Skywalker Ranch, he turned off the engine, but didn’t move to get out. He would wait for her. If she needed him, he would be there.  _

_ “I like your car.” She said. “I don’t know anything about cars, but I know this one is beautiful.”  _

_ “‘76 Ford Maverick.” He said, touching the dashboard. “I fixed it up the summer after my last tour.”  _

_ She nodded, turning to look away. He watched her carefully, waiting for her to continue. She looked back at him, vulnerable and misty-eyed. Tears fell, running down her face.  _

_ “Thank you. For back there. I—” Her voice broke.  _

_ “Shhhh,” Kylo reached out, brushing away her tears. “You don’t have to thank me.”  _

_ His heart tightened to see her crying, to see her in pain.  _

_ “N-no, no, I do. You didn’t have to do that for me. You—” _

_ “I did. I did have to. I did it for you, Y/N.” He held her face in his hands, caressing her cheek with his thumb.  _

_ He held her like a precious gem, admiring her for as long as he could. She reached up, covering his hand with her smaller one. She pulled his hand away, pressing a soft kiss to his palm. Something bubbled up from within him, intense feeling and impulse. It made him unsteady. He could barely trust himself not to tell her everything, how he— _

_ “You have your Control Face on.” She said, smiling.  _

_ “Control Face?” He nearly laughed.  _

_ “Yeah, it’s the face you make when Poe says something snarky or when we argue in the hallway. Like you’re trying to hold back, like you’re trying not to feel.” Y/N traced the lines on his palm before looking back up at him. “You don’t have to hold back, Kylo.”  _

_ He pulled his hands out of her grasp, looking out the window but seeing only that night in the bar, the things he’d done... _

_ “You don’t understand.”  _

_ “Then explain it to me.” Y/N pleaded, touching his cheek. “Don’t shut me out again.”  _

_ He looked at her, taking in her eyes and nose and that little freckle by her eye. He felt himself falling, drawn by the strongest impulse he’d ever had to fight. She leaned up, expecting. But she didn’t know. She didn’t know what he was capable of– all the hurt and pain. _

_ “It’s better this way.”  _

Kylo desperately needed to get out of this room. He strode to the door, stumbling back a step to stop from slamming into her. She looked up at him, expression fierce. 

“We need to talk. Now.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kylo needs a hug...we'll see if he finally gets one in the next chapter :D


	7. Breakthroughs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo opens up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one more chapter after this one! I can't believe it's almost over.....

Y/N pressed her hand to the middle of his chest, pushing him back into his room. She kicked the door shut behind them. Kylo was too surprised to resist, backpedaling until his knees hit the edge of the bed. He sat down heavily, putting them at eye level. Y/N stood in front of him, leaving several inches of space between their bodies, but not enough for him to escape. She crossed her arms over her chest, staring him down. 

“I thought you were at work.” 

“Han gave me the day off.” She explained. 

Kylo nodded, looking down at his hands. 

“He told me to rest,” She continued, “But I couldn’t.” 

His head snapped up, looking her up and down with worry in his eyes. “Are you okay?” 

“No, I’m not.” 

He clenched his fists, brow furrowed. “Did something happen? Did that fucking creep try to–” 

“Let me finish,” She said, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder. “I couldn’t rest because I’m worried about you. Kylo, I–” 

She sighed, trying to find the words. 

“Look, maybe I’ve been reading everything wrong but I thought we had something...a connection. But you keep pushing me away, you keep putting up walls. I want you to know that I am here for you, you can show me whatever it is you’re keeping bottled up inside of you. I care about you so much more than I care about whatever is holding you back. I want to help you, Kylo. I want to be with you.” 

“With me?” 

Her eyes widened as her brain caught up with her words. 

“Y-yes. With you. But, um, if a friend is what you want...I can do that. I need you to see that you don’t have to shut me out anymore.” She took his hand. “You don’t have to be alone.” 

“If I tell you,” He shook his head. “You won’t want to be with me.” 

“Try me.” 

Kylo took a deep breath, running a hand through his hair. “Fine.” 

Y/N sat beside him on the bed, ready to listen. She kept hold of his hand, brushing her thumb over his knuckles. He stared straight ahead at the door, beginning to speak. 

“Last year, um, a few days after Christmas, I had an argument with my parents at the Falcon. I was getting ready to leave and spend the rest of the break with some guys from my unit. Dad wanted me to hang around and help out at the bar, but I...I don’t know. I said ‘no’ even though that’s what I’d wanted since I was a kid. Too little, too late, is what I told them. I don’t remember the specifics anymore but it got ugly fast, in the way arguments always do. It stopped being about the bar and became about everything. I got in Dad’s face, he got in mine, Mom was in both our faces and then–” 

He stopped, voice breaking. 

“Then Dad just froze up. His face got all red and he stumbled and then collapsed. I did CPR while Mom called the ambulance and, uh, he’s okay now, he’s okay, but–” He sniffed, a few tears falling down his face. “His heart did stop for a minute and a half. He was dead. And it was my fault.” 

Y/N squeezed his hand. 

“And I did things, you know, when I was in the military. Stuff that I–but this was different. Someone I care about–he’s  _ my dad. _ And I almost killed him. I did kill him.” 

He pulled away, covering his face with his hands. 

“I’m dangerous and I hurt people. Even the ones I–even you. Do you see now? Do you see why I pushed you away? You’re better off without me. You’re  _ safe _ without me, Y/N.” 

“Stop.” Y/N pulled his hands away from his face, making him look at her. “Stop saying that.” 

“It’s true.” 

“No, it’s not.” She said firmly. “I’m not better off without you, but let’s pretend for a second that I listen to this bullshit and walk away. Let’s pretend I say: ‘Sure, the man who fought for me and protects me against everything including the cold and bar creeps isn’t worth it because of his past.’ Let’s imagine I get up and walk out that door.” 

Y/N reached up, gently taking his face in her hands, making him look at her. “What happens to you? Who’s going to take care of  _ you? _ I know Poe is coming around, but he’s still stuck up there in his little Golden Boy world. I love your dad, but he’s 95% of where your stubbornness came from. You’re impulsive and you don’t communicate well and God, you infuriate me. But you have one of the deepest souls and kindest hearts of anyone I’ve ever known. If I walk away right now, who is going to show you that you deserve to feel, to be listened to, and to be loved? Yeah, sure,  _ maybe _ I’ll be better off without you, but will you be better off without me?” 

His eyes shone as he looked at her, appearing impossibly young in the low light of the bedroom. Y/N recognized the kind boy who could pinpoint heartbreak in others and try to glue them back together, piece by piece. Y/N saw his heartbreak, saw the person lost behind the walls, afraid of rejection and failure. Y/N ran a hand through his hair. As if she had flicked a switch within him, he unfroze, letting his tears fall and his breath out with a heart-wrenching sob. 

Y/N opened herself to him. They fell backwards together, hands grasping desperately at the safety and warmth of each other. She gripped him tightly, her tears mixing with his own. They spoke in the way souls do, without words, but with meaning that resonated in their bones. 

When they ran out of tears, they lay together in an embrace. Somewhere along the way, Y/N slipped into an ocean of dreams. 

Delicate golden light of morning filtered through the window, tickling her face as Y/N resurfaced. She blinked awake, stretching and curling her toes in the incomparable warmth and comfort of being held. 

“You stayed.” His lips brushed against her forehead. 

A shiver ran down her spine at the sleep-lingering husk of his voice. She nuzzled into the crook of his neck, obsessed with the fabric of his black tee-shirt and the sheets and him and how the pine and leather scent clung to everything he touched. Y/N half-heartedly lifted her arm, pushing slightly against his own. 

“Couldn’t exactly escape, could I?” She pulled back to look him in the eye. “And I didn’t want to, anyway.” 

He stared at her, eyes tracking over her face. 

“Control Face.” She smiled. “I thought I told you not to hold back with me anymore.” 

“Are you sure?” His hands trailed up her arms, fingers brushing soft lines across her skin. 

“As sure as I’ve ever been about anything.” 

He slipped his fingers into her hair, cradling the back of her head. His Control Face was gone, replaced by the dark look of intent she remembered from the night at the bar when she took his order. He hesitated an instant longer, giving her a final option to back out. She didn’t even need to think about it. 

Y/N closed the space between them, pressing her lips to his. A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth as he kissed back. 

She pulled away, a grin spreading across her face. “What?” 

“Nothing.” He shook his head. “Just you. You’re beyond anything I’ve ever known.” 

Y/N pressed her forehead to his chest, hiding in embarrassment. He tucked his thumb under her chin, nudging her face to look at him. 

“I mean it.” 

“I used to think you hated me.” She said. “I wanted you to like me so badly.” 

He chuckled. “Why?” 

“Um, have you met yourself?” She gestured down his body. “The super hot, mysterious and brilliant older guy. How could I not want you to like me?” 

He squeezed his eyes shut. “I did like you. I liked you so much it scared the shit out of me.” 

“So you pushed me away.” 

“I did.” He kissed the palm of her hand, eyes full of regret. “I made you cry.” 

“I forgive you.” 

“Just like that?” A smile played on his lips. “You’re not going to ask me to make it up to you?” 

“I suppose I  _ was _ very hurt at the time. Retroactive retribution doesn’t sound so–” 

He shifted suddenly, propping himself up on his forearms to hover above her. He silenced her with a deep kiss. She let her hands fall around his shoulders, playing with the hair at the back of his neck. He pulled back, trailing kisses across her jaw and down her neck. Y/N let her eyes flutter closed. 

“Yeah, I definitely take back my forgiveness. You have a lot to make up for, buddy.” 

He returned to her face, a dark glint in his eye. “Shut up.” 

“Make me.” 

~

“You’re down late.” Rey raised an eyebrow at Y/N as she sat down for breakfast. 

“Slept in.” Y/N explained with a shrug. “For once.” 

“Good morning family!” Poe practically sang as he entered with Finn in toe. 

Y/N chuckled. “Good morning, sunshine. What’s got you in such a good mood?” 

Poe did a sweeping lap of the table, planting a kiss on Y/N’s cheek, slapping his father on the back and hugging a very disgruntled Luke. 

“Oh, you know…” He and Finn shared a secret look, the kind only lovers share. “Life!” 

Luke rolled his eyes as Poe plopped down beside him and began scooping eggs onto his plate. The doors opened again and a certain tall, dark figure arrived. He certainly wasn’t singing, but there was an almost imperceptible lightness, a grace to his stride, as if the weight of the past ten years had been lifted. Y/N smiled into her cup, trying not to let her eyes linger too long. 

They had agreed, tangled together in his bed, to keep their relationship a secret for a while. Whatever was between Y/N and Kylo was too new and too undefined to explain to the others. The truth of her desire to hide she felt matched in the beat of his heart beneath her hand–they wanted to stay in their bubble, just the two of them, for as long as possible. 

Kylo sat down next to her. “Good morning.” 

His voice was like a spark, igniting a wave of memories— his hands, his chest, his voice whispering words of praise as he—she cleared her throat. 

“Good morning.” She nodded, flustered. 

He kept his expression neutral, but there was a certain pride in his posture as Kylo turned his attention to the breakfast table. Luke eyed his nephew, suspicious. 

“Hey, how are you doing kiddo?” Han looked at Y/N with paternal concern. 

“Better.” Y/N nodded, “Much better.” 

Kylo shifted slowly, placing his hand on her knee under the table. She kept her gaze straight ahead, pouring herself a cup of tea.

“Good.” Han said, staring disdainfully at his piece of wholegrain toast. “Do you think you’re up to coming back today? Finn will need some help with Trivia Tuesday.” 

Kylo stiffened. Y/N moved her napkin to her lap, sliding her hand further so she could cover his hand with hers. 

“I’ll be there.” 

“You’re welcome to come too, Ben,” Han’s expression remained casual, but there was a hint of mirth in his tone, “Although I don’t anticipate any bar fights over who knows the most about Mandalore.” 

“Hey, we could totally win that!” Poe exclaimed. “Remember, Ben, we used to plan to run away and become Mandalorians. I pretended to capture C-3 for bounty and Ben had a helmet and—” 

“Yes, I remember. Thank you.” Kylo interrupted with a clipped tone. 

Y/N grinned, noting the red tinge creeping up his neck. She turned to Rey with a mischievous glint in her eye. 

“You should all come as a sibling team! Finn, what’s the prize today?” 

“Gift cards for free drinks at the bar.” 

“Now that’s a prize that can’t be beat!” Rey said with faux enthusiasm. 

“Come on, please? I need a team to root for.” Y/N pouted. 

“I’ll do it if Ben does it too.” Rey crossed her arms, assured of her victory. 

He considered it for a moment, trying to keep his face blank as Y/N hit him with her best puppy eyes. He sat back, tilting his head to the side in concession. 

“I can’t say no to a free drink.”

Rey groaned as Y/N pumped her fist in the air with a victorious whoop. 

“The kitchen is about to close, so last call for food!” 

Y/N handled the last few orders of fries, pushing the plates through the window between the kitchen and the bar. She leaned against the counter, watching the game for a few minutes. The siblings sat together around a table, Poe and Rey squabbling and nudging each other. Kylo remained stoic, but relaxed— the calm center between two boisterous personalities. 

He turned his head, catching her eyes across the bar. She stuck her tongue out at him. She watched his shoulders rise for a moment, a hint of a laugh. Y/N bit her lip, pushing down the impulse to screw it all and run to him. Y/N turned away, focused on cleaning up the kitchen before venturing out into the crowd. 

“This seat taken?” She gestured to the chair beside Rey. 

“Yeah,” Rey smiled. “By you.” 

Y/N tipped her head back, laughing. “Smooth.” 

“I know, right?” Rey gloated. 

“Hey.” Poe tried to look serious despite the tipsy blush across his cheeks. “Did you make these fries?” 

“I did.” 

“They are fucking amazing.” He pointed one at her. “Delicious. I dunno if I like these or the cookies more.” 

“Definitely the cookies.” 

Y/N caught Kylo’s gaze, breath catching at the earnesty in his brown eyes. She smiled softly at him. 

“I’ll keep that in mind.” She said, mentally scheduling time to make a batch for him the next morning. 

Finn stopped by their table on his way to announce the next question. He placed a drink down in front of Y/N. 

“I didn’t order anything.” 

“I know,” Finn smiled. “Courtesy of the cutie at the bar over there.” 

Y/N turned around, searching the bar. A guy probably a few years older than her with dark blonde hair and blue eyes stared back at her. He nodded, sending her a charming smile. She nodded back, lips pressed together. 

“Who are you calling a cutie?” Poe whined. “I’m way cuter than that womp rat.”

“Yes, yes you are.” Finn chuckled, giving his boyfriend a kiss before going up to the mic. 

Kylo’s hands tightened around his glass, glaring at the man by the bar. Y/N cleared her throat, pushing the drink away from her, towards Poe. 

“I don’t drink. D’you want it?” 

“Fuck yes.” He took a big swig before resting his chin on his hand and listening to Finn ask the next question with wide, admiring eyes. 

“Alright Trivia Teams, it’s time for the next question. What are members of the Mandalorian creed who are not born in Mandalore called?”

Rey tapped the pen against the table. “Shoot, I should know this.” 

“Foundlings.” Kylo answered easily, turning back to the table. 

“How the hell do you remember all this?” Rey muttered, scribbling the answer down. 

“Sorry to interrupt–” a voice spoke from over Y/N’s shoulder. “But I was wondering if you’d like to have a drink with me.” 

Y/N turned to face the stranger, seeing Kylo tense in her peripheral vision. “No thanks.” 

“Oh,” the stranger seemed surprised, “But I sent you a drink…?” 

“Yeah, I didn’t ask for it, but thank you.” 

“But–” 

“She said no already.” Kylo practically growled. 

The stranger’s eyes widened as he took in the thunder in Kylo’s expression. He stumbled back to the bar, muttering vague excuses. 

“What was that?” Rey asked, looking between them. “He was really cute.” 

“Eh, not really.” Y/N shrugged, looking at Kylo meaningfully. “I’m more into the tall, dark, handsome type.” 

“So you won’t mind if I shoot my shot?” Rey raised an eyebrow.

“Be my guest.” 

“Brilliant.” Rey smirked, getting up and heading for the bar. 

“How much longer is the trivia game?” Y/N asked, casually moving over into Rey’s seat to get a better look at the answer card. 

She inspected it carefully, heart rate increasing when she felt Kylo’s warmth mere inches away from her. Y/N sat back, brushing her shoulder against the side of his chest. She yawned. 

“I don’t know if I can make it through another four questions,” Y/N mused, “I’m pretty beat. I think I’ll head home.” 

“I can drive you.” Kylo said, a little too quickly. 

Poe didn’t seem to notice his brother’s over-eager reaction. “What? No, you’re our star player!” 

Kylo was already on his feet, pulling on his leather jacket. He pulled out Y/N chair for her. He patted Poe on the shoulder. 

“You’ll be fine.” Kylo assured, gently guiding Y/N towards the back door. 

Just as soon as the cool night air hit her skin, the smooth wall of the bar hit her back. Kylo pressed up against her, hands grasping at her waist as he pressed his lips to hers. The kiss was rougher than usual, possessive and heated. Y/N let her hands tangle in his hair, matching fire with fire. She chased his lips as he pulled away, desperate to taste him a moment longer. Kylo leant his forehead against hers. 

“Does that happen a lot?” He asked, breathing hard. 

“Not enough.” Y/N laughed, kissing him again. 

He pulled back. “Not this. The guy.” 

“No, that’s the first time. That and last week…” She sighed. “I normally go right home after closing the kitchen. But tonight I wanted to see you.” 

He closed his eyes and sighed, letting some of the tension out of his shoulders. He cupped her face in his hands, kissing her more gently. 

“Good.” 

“Did you want to see me too?” She asked, biting her bottom lip. 

He looked down at her, pupils blown so wide the amber of his irises was nearly gone. “Oh, I want to do more than just that.” 

She leaned up, lips brushing the shell of his ear. “Then what are you waiting for, soldier?” 

“Fuck if I know.” He growled, half-dragging, half-carrying her to his car. 


	8. Summertime Shenanigans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y/N and Kylo can't keep their secret forever...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it! This story was a blast to write, and I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did. Thank you so so so much for reading, leaving kudos, and commenting. It lets me know that I'm doing something right. Thank you. <3

It was a miracle Y/N and Kylo managed to keep their relationship a secret for as long as they did. Maker knows they weren’t being especially careful or secretive. The pieces were all out there for anyone to pick up and put together if they wanted to. 

Take Kylo’s phone background for example. 

“You want it? You want it?” Y/N hurled the stick as far as she could. “Go get it!” 

Artoo and Beebee took off, streaks of grey and yellow across the yard. Artoo got there first, trotting back with his prize, triumphant. Beebee hadn’t quite grasped the concept, and remained a few yards away, searching for the stick. 

“Beebee, come here!” The puppy looked up, head tilted. “Come here, you silly boy.” 

He seemed to understand that at least, and came bounding back over, tail wagging. Y/N scratched behind his ears with one hand and pet Artoo with the other, showering them in well-deserved praise. Artoo dropped the stick at her feet. She threw it again, watching them run. 

Hands slid around her waist, clasping at her bellybutton. Kylo buried his nose in her hair, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. She wiggled slightly in his grasp. 

“Kylo, someone will see.” She warned. 

“No one’s home.” He said. 

“Well in that case…” She turned, craning her neck to kiss him. “Hi.” 

“Hello.” She felt his greeting reverberate through his chest. 

Y/N leaned back against his chest as the dogs ran back, chasing excited circles around them. Kylo released his grip, playfully wrestling the stick away from Artoo. The dogs watched him carefully, expectant. He pulled his arm back and swung it forward quickly. The dogs ran off, unaware of the stick still held in Kylo’s hand. 

Y/N nudged him. “You’re so mean.” 

He chuckled, tossing the stick in another direction for the dogs to follow. Put off by his little trick, they left the stick where it was. Instead, they ran back to Y/N. She knelt down to pet them, laughing as they nudged her with cold noses and licked her face. 

Kylo’s chest tightened as a soft smile took over his face. He pulled out his phone, crouching down and taking a photo of the sweet moment. It didn’t last long, though. He fell back onto his butt as the dogs turned on him, jumping and licking. 

Y/N’s laughter was like sunlight, full of warmth. He tilted his head towards it, smiling.

Not just the phone, either. Anyone with a decent pair of ears could have heard the footsteps and bedroom doors closing in the middle of the night. 

Moonlight slanted through the window, the rectangle of light stretching across the floor and over the bed, illuminating Y/N’s legs tangled with Kylo’s between the sheets. She lay against his chest, tracing the scars on his chest. He wrapped his arm around her waist, keeping her close. 

“You never answered my question.” He said, kissing her forehead.

“Hmm?” 

“That day in the hallway the first week you were here. I asked why. You never answered.” 

“That feels like so long ago,” She murmured. “My house is being renovated so my mom is taking a road trip. Rey offered and...here we are.” 

“What about your dad?” 

She was quiet for a moment. “He died when I was ten.” 

Kylo brushed the back of his hand against her ribs, waiting for her. 

“He was crossing the street to his car at the end of the day and, um, it was winter so the sun had gone down earlier than usual. The guy driving was on the phone and it was dark and he…he hit Dad. They said he died almost instantly, and I know they say that so you’re not worried about them being in pain but...it never made me feel any better. He’s still gone.” 

“What was he like?” 

“I don’t remember a lot of things, I was so young.” She admitted, voice wavering slightly. “But um, he read to me before bed, and he was usually late to everything, and he always kept peppermints in his pockets. Mom says he was far from a perfect man, but he was a pretty perfect dad.” 

Kylo reached up, brushing away her tears with his thumb. She took his hand, letting their entwined fingers rest over his heart.

And then there was the time Han almost caught them. 

Y/N shouldered the back door open, checking items off on her clipboard. She was so busy scribbling down numbers and checking items off the list she relied on her mental map of the bar. Naturally, it didn’t include the tall figure emerging from Han’s office. 

Strong hands caught her arms, stopping her from running straight into his chest. Y/N looked up in surprise, met with the rare smile he saved for her and her alone. 

“We have to stop meeting like this, Mr. Solo.” 

“I kind of like it.” He shrugged, pushing her out of sight of the office window. “You throwing yourself at me…” 

Y/N scoffed. “I am  _ not _ throwing myself at you.” 

“Okay, maybe I’m throwing myself at you.” He kissed the spot under her ear that always sent shivers down her spine. 

“Kylo, someone might see!” She wiggled out of his grip, looking out for Han or Chewie. “What are you doing here?” 

“Nice to see you too.” 

“I’m delighted to see you,” She kissed him quickly. “Of course. But you’re not usually here.” 

He looked down at his shoes, suddenly shy. “I was, uh, helping Dad with the books.” 

A grin spread across Y/N’s face. “Really? Oh, that’s wonderful!” 

Kylo glanced around, ushering Y/N further back into the kitchen. He spoke at a lower volume, a blush creeping across his face. 

“Our relationship isn’t exactly perfect now, or anything.” 

“What relationship is?” Y/N squeezed his hand. “This is a great start, Kylo.” 

“Yeah,” He waved his hand, desperate to change the subject, “Why are you here so early?” 

“Supply delivery.” She explained. “Actually, I was about to try out a new recipe. Want to help?” 

He blanched. “Oh, I’m not–I don’t, um...”

“C’mon, you make yourself breakfast every day.” 

“Anyone can make eggs.” He argued. 

“You’d be surprised.” She pulled him closer to the counter. “I’ll be right here. No judgements. Just you and me making some food. Please?” 

He sighed, unable to resist her. “Fine.”

“Yay!” She cheered, leaning up to kiss him. 

He pressed a hand to the small of her back, lengthening the kiss a moment longer. When she pulled back he followed. Y/N put her finger over his lips, separating them. 

“Nice try, Solo, but you’re not distracting me.” 

He relented, stepping back to accept an apron. Y/N kissed him once more while he tied the strings, swayed by the utterly pathetic look on his face. She opened her thick blue recipe binder to the marked page. 

“Okay,” She clapped her hands. “Crepes.” 

For all his doubts, Kylo was a quick learner and an excellent partner. He followed Y/N’s directions for measuring and mixing to the letter. He even stayed focused on preparing the fillings when he could have made another attempt at  _ distracting _ Y/N while the batter rested. The first three crepes were a disaster–misshapen amoebas of barely cooked batter. They got steadily better, becoming more circular, thinner, until they managed to make two in a row that looked just like the picture in the recipe. Kylo wrapped his arms around Y/N from behind, kissing her neck in triumph. 

The aesthetic element went out the window after that, as she tried to balance technique with sensations caused by his lips on her neck. Kylo switched off the burner while she flipped the last crepe onto the plate. He spun her around in his arms so they were chest to chest. He stared at her for a moment, admiring the adorable smudge of flour on her cheek. Impatient, she surged forward, crashing her lips to his. 

Kylo smiled slightly into the kiss, his chest full of deep emotions she inspired when he heard, looked at, or touched her. Y/N wound her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. She breathed him in, luxuriating in the scent of pine, leather, and  _ him _ . She was drowning in it, but there were certainly worse ways to go. 

Han’s voice, muffled from the other side of the door, popped their little bubble. Kylo and Y/N sprang apart, Y/N scooping up the plate of crepes and Kylo trying to look casual as the door swung open. 

“And then Lando says–” Han paused, noticing them. “Hey, kiddo, you’re in early.” 

“Haha, yeah.” Y/N put the plate down, pointing to it. “Just experimenting. New recipe.” 

“I didn’t realize you knew how to make crepes, son.” He said dryly, looking to Kylo. 

“I don’t.” He swallowed. “She just needed an extra pair of hands.” 

“Uh huh.” Y/N nodded. “Would you like some? They’re pretty much ready.” 

Chewie replied with enthusiasm, plopping down at the counter. Y/N prepared four crepes while Han continued with his story. Kylo moved past her to hang up his apron, brushing his fingertips over her back. She let out a shaky breath. 

“You okay, kid?” 

“What? Yeah, yeah, I’m good.” She fumbled, shoving a plate towards him. “Here you go.” 

Han eyed her suspiciously, taking a bite. “Hey, this is good. What is that, blueberry?” 

“And strawberry with a little whipped cream.” 

“Well shit. Add it to the specials this week.”

“Yes sir.” She nodded, adding a note to the recipe. 

“I have more clients to see today,” Kylo said, inching towards the door. “I’ll see you later. Tomorrow. I’ll see you tomorrow. At breakfast.” 

“Sure will.” Han said, eyeing Kylo too. 

Kylo nodded, practically sprinting out of the door.

“Did he do something? Or say something to you before I came in? I know he can be–” 

“Lovely. He was lovely.” Y/N assured. 

Han humphed, shoveling another bite of crepe into his mouth. 

Everything was revealed eventually, of course. And with those two, who could expect anything but a revelation of spectacular proportions. 

Y/N made it up the last few steps to the tower. She shouldered the door open, trying to undo the first few buttons on her blouse. Kylo was waiting for her. He shifted against the headboard, shutting his book. 

“You’re back late.” 

“I know,” She walked over to kiss him quickly on her way to the closet. “Chewie was telling a story and got a little too excited. He knocked over half a shelf and I stayed to help clean up the mess...both literally and physically. Han was not happy.” 

“When is he ever.” Kylo grumbled. 

Y/N walked back over in sweatpants, pulling on a tank top. “How was your day?” 

He shrugged, but as she studied him, Y/N saw the tension in his shoulders. She sat on the edge of the bed. Y/N ran a hand through the soft waves of dark hair, waiting for him to speak. 

“I was doing some consulting for Mitaka’s Garden Supply today.” Kylo let his hand fall to her thigh, running his thumb back and forth in a soothing motion. “That guy...he just puts me on edge.” 

“Why?” 

“Well, he’s got a stick up his ass for one thing.” 

Y/N stifled a laugh, noting the furrow in his brow. 

“For another, he reminds me of...he reminds me of this guy I served with in the Marines– Hux. I  _ hated  _ him.” Kylo seethed. “The feeling was mutual.” 

His gaze turned inward, and Y/N could tell he was remembering. Kylo let go of her leg, twisting the blanket in his fists. Y/N scooted closer to him, cupping his face in her hands. 

“Hey, hey,” Her tone was measured and calm, “It’s okay, look at me. All of that is in the past.” 

Kylo blinked, meeting her gaze. His expression softened and his breathing evened out. 

“Listen, this Huck dude sounds like a real weenie.” 

Kylo laughed. “Hux.” 

“Whatever.” She rolled her eyes, leaning forward to kiss him again.

He held her waist, pulling her closer. Y/N squeezed his shoulder as she pulled away. She slipped out of his grasp and stood up before things got heated. 

“As much as I want to stay here, I promised Rey we could watch a movie tonight.” 

Kylo’s face fell, but Y/N was too busy pulling on a sweater to see it. 

“I’ll be back later,” She said, “You don’t have to stay up for me.” 

He stood up, expression growing stormier by the moment. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“She texted me when I was at work. I was so busy I only really had time to text her back before another order came in.” Y/N said, a spark of irritation flaring in her chest. “I haven’t had a chance to spend time with Rey in almost a week.” 

He paced towards the door. “I haven’t seen you all day. I wanted–” 

“You’re seeing me now, Kylo.” Y/N interrupted. “You saw me this morning in your bed. You saw me last night. You’re going to see me when I done hanging out with my best friend.” 

“Don’t do that.” He said, stepping closer to her. 

“Do what?” Y/N threw her hands up in exasperation. 

“Don’t talk to me like I’m an asshole just because I want to spend time with you.” 

“I didn’t say that!” She argued. 

“It’s what you’re thinking.” He challenged. 

“Oh, so you can read minds now?” 

“I can read you.” He closed the space between them, looming over her. “I know you. I know when it comes down to it, you’re going to choose them.” 

Y/N stopped short, as his words sunk in. Her anger cooled rapidly into dismay. She stared up at him with wide eyes. 

“See?” He said, voice full of bitterness. “It’s true. You know it is.” 

Kylo began to turn away, but Y/N grabbed his arm. She wasn’t nearly strong enough to hold him, but he let her. 

“Kylo…” She said, her voice clogged by the lump in her throat. “If you think that’s true then you don’t know me at all.” 

He glared at a spot on the floor, trying to burn a hole through the wood. Y/N took his face in her hands, making him look at her. 

“I was so busy trying to make your family see who you are I didn’t realize that you’re the most blind out of all of them. There is no us against them. You’re not the villain in this story, Kylo.”

“This is just a distraction, a summer fling before you go back to–” 

“Stop talking.” Y/N covered his mouth with her hand. “You’re not just some distraction for me before I go back to my ‘real life.’ You’re as real as real can be. Kylo, I would choose you in Fall, Winter, Spring, at school, at home, at the bar. What we have...it’s...I’ve never–” She broke off, fully processing what he’d said. “Um, unless you want this to be a summer thing? We never actually defined what this is. If that’s what you want...I can...I…” 

She stepped back, panic clawing up her throat and blurring her vision. Kylo matched her step for step, steadying her with his warm grip. 

“Look at me, Y/N.” 

There was something in the way he said it that made Y/N feel like her body was moving of its own accord while her mind spun, meeting his gaze. She felt her breath catch, seeing something in his face she’d never seen before. Y/N had seen Kylo angry, vulnerable, and rarest of all, happy. But this...this made her chest tighten and her stomach flip and she was so afraid of the hope bubbling up within her– hope that the emotion in his face matched the one in her heart. 

“You are more than a distraction to me.” He said. “Y/N, you are more than anything to me. I–” 

She held her breath, waiting for him to say it.  _ Say it. _

He kissed her, deeply. It was messy, teeth clicking and tears mixing. Her hands were in his hair and his were everywhere. She pressed closer to him, feeling his heartbeat more than she heard it. Y/N wanted to forget where she ended and he began, she–

“What the fuck.” Rey stood completely still for a moment, frozen in the doorway. 

Y/N pulled away from Kylo, wondering how many more surprises her heart could take. He kept his arm around her, keeping her close. Rey looked between them, dumbfounded. Y/N mirrored her surprise, looking up at Kylo in confusion. 

_ Why isn’t he trying to hide this?  _

As the connections in her head clicked into place, Rey’s expression morphed into one of sheer rage. 

“You  _ bastard _ !” She yelled, flying at Kylo. 

He moved fast, pushing Y/N out of harm’s way as Rey tackled him. The youngest Solo sibling was a force to be reckoned with, throwing punch after punch. Kylo tried to keep up, blocking as many as he could. He didn’t fight back, but when her fist connected with his jaw, he lost patience. He hooked his arm around her leg, pulling Rey off of him. He stood up, but she followed fast, not even close to finished. 

“That’s my best friend, you asshole!” She screamed. 

She ran at him again, trying to pin him again. Unable to watch any longer, Y/N tried to intervene. 

“Rey, stop.” She moves closer. 

Kylo sent her a look of warning, and Y/N stayed put. Rey didn’t relent, yelling a string of colorful names and phrases at her brother. 

“He didn’t do anything wrong! Stop it!” Y/N yelled. 

Footsteps clattered up the stone stairs and the door burst open again. Poe, Finn, and Han poured in, with C-3 and Luke hot on their heels. 

“What the hell is going on up here?” Han took in the scene. “Oh Jesus Christ, Ben, not again.” 

“He didn’t start this.” Y/N argued. 

Poe and Finn jumped into the fray, each grabbing one of Rey’s arms and pulling her away from Kylo. She struggled against them, trying to run at him again. Y/N moved quickly, stepping in front of Kylo, shielding him from his family. 

“Will someone please explain what’s happening right now?” Poe pleaded, looking at his sister like she was a rabid dog that could bite at any moment. 

“He,” Rey pointed at Kylo “took advantage of her.” 

“That’s not true.” Y/N said. 

“He was grabbing you kissing you!” Rey yelled, getting riled up again. 

“What?” Poe grimaced, hands curled into fists at his side. “What the hell, Ben?” 

“Now hang on a minute, has anyone considered that maybe Y/N can handle herself and that this could have been a consensual event?” Luke interjected, as if the whole matter bored him more than a trip to the DMV. 

“Is that true?” Han asked, looking from Y/N to his son. 

Kylo moved to stand beside her, head held high. 

“Oh my God!” Rey wailed, “You’re fucking my best friend!” 

“No, it’s not like that. Well we are—I mean we’re not  _ just— _ ” Y/N fumbled, looking to Kylo in distress. “Help me, please.” 

He looked down at her, the strange new expression written all over his features once more. He took her hand, facing his family once again. 

“I love her.” He said. 

Y/N’s heart plummeted and soared all at once. His grip on her hand was the only thing tethering her to the earth, keeping her from floating away into the atmosphere. 

“I love him.” She said, more certain than she’d ever been in her life. 

For the first time in their lives, the Skywalker-Solo family were stunned into silence. They stared, wide-eyed and open-mouthed. 

“Oh, this is wonderful! I always did think you and Master Ben would make a lovely couple.” C-3 said, breaking the silence. 

“Thank you, Charles.” Kylo said. 

Han began to laugh. A big, stomach aching, laugh. 

“Well I’ll be damned.” He wiped tears from his eyes, coming forward to pat Kylo on the shoulder. 

He turned and left the room, laughing the whole way with C-3 tottering behind. Luke followed, smiling knowingly at the couple over his shoulder. Finn nudged Poe with his elbow, grinning from ear to ear. Poe pulled a twenty dollar bill out of his pocket, slapping it into his boyfriend’s hand. 

“Not a word.” Poe warned, walking out. 

Finn winked at Y/N. “I’m happy for you both.” 

“Thanks, Finn.” Y/N smiled. 

Kylo put his arm around Y/N’s shoulder, tucking her closer to him as Rey finally stepped forward again. She studied them for a moment, eyes narrowed. 

“If you  _ ever _ hurt her…” 

“I know.” He said. “I’d deserve it.” 

“Good.” She nodded, satisfied. 

“I’ll be down in a minute to watch the movie.” Y/N said. 

“Good. I need something to burn those images out of my brain.” 

“Shut up.” Y/N laughed. 

“See you downstairs.” 

They managed to wait until the door closed and her footsteps receded down the second floor corridor. 

Kylo spun Y/N around in his grasp, holding her face in his hands. He kissed her, holding her up as she melted into him. She pulled away after a moment, breathless. 

“I love you, Kylo.” 

He pressed another heated kiss to her mouth before moving to the spot under her ear that always made her breath catch. He smiled proudly when he heard it, whispering into her skin. 

“I love you so much.” He said, looking deeply into her eyes. “I want you to call me Ben.” 

“Ben.” She repeated with a soft smile before pulling his face back up to hers, kissing him again. 

She pressed her forehead to his. “I have to go.” 

“I love you.” He reminded her.

“I’ll go in a minute.” She decided. 

Ben smiled, pulling her backwards onto the bed with him. Her happy laughter bounced off the walls like the sweetest music he’d ever heard. 

~

Leia’s car pulled into the driveway on a humid morning in early August. Finally returning home from a long two months of work in the Capitol, her shoulders felt infinitely lighter at the mere sight of her home. 

“See you in a few weeks, Senator.” Leia’s assistant said with a smile. 

“Enjoy your time off, Rose.” She said to her assistant as she got out of the car. 

Leia opened the front door. A cry of “I’m home” dying on her lips as she was met with utter chaos. Little foam pieces littered the floor, and indistinct shouts and screams could be heard from the rest of the house. 

Poe dashed into the foyer, skidding on his way from the dining room to the living room at the sight of his mother. 

“Perfect! You can be on my team.” He planted a quick kiss on her cheek, grabbing her arm and pulling her with him.

“Poe! What on earth–?”

“No time to explain!” He said, handing her a plastic gun and pulling another from the back of his waistband. “Just point and shoot.” 

“Ah ha!” Rey and Finn popped up from behind the couch with toy weapons of their own–long cardboard tubes. 

Leia hesitated for only a second before giving in to the ridiculousness. She raised her arm, hitting them with one foam bolt each. 

“Yes!” Poe cheered. “Go Mom!” 

An ear-splitting noise erupted from the doorway. Han, Luke, and Chewie all barrelled inside, back-to-back in a tight cluster. They rotated with smooth precision, foam bolts raining down. Poe and Leia leapt, shooting their own plastic blasters and in a moment, both the trio and the Mother-son team were down. Bodies lay on the floor, shaking with laughter. Steps slowly thudded down the stairs, heads turning to see what could possibly be happening now. 

Ben emerged, carrying Y/N in his arms. She lay limp, but couldn’t quite fight the smile spreading across her face. 

“My love has been slain.” He announced, dropping to his knees. “Without her, I have no reason to go on.” 

Ben lifted her up dramatically, cradling her head in his hands. He kissed her, and her arms wound instinctively around his neck, kissing him back. Poe coughed and she jumped a little before returning to her lifeless pose.

“Thus with a kiss,” Ben whispered. “I die.” 

He fell over her, looking very much like a fallen hero. Y/N leaned up slightly to whisper into Ben’s ear. 

“You should consider acting. You’re very convincing.” 

He laughed, sitting up and helping her to her feet. The others erupted into arguments over who had won, and whether alliances of more than two had been agreed upon. 

“Excuse me!” Leia shouted, quieting them immediately. 

She looked from one face to the other, taking in their happy smiles. Finally she fixed on Y/N and Ben with their fingers intertwined and eyes full of love. 

“What the hell happened while I was gone?” 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to my Star Wars consultant and all around support system, Nyvera. If you like my Kylo stuff, you'll adore hers, so check it the fuck out. 
> 
> Chapter 2 will be out very soon indeed. 
> 
> Let me know what you think by leaving a comment! They make my day. <3


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